March 2, 2008

Samuel: Hello, dears.

Greetings, Samuel.

S: What’s different in here?

All of us.

S: Bonnie says, “All of us. We are different.” It’s true, you’re different right now from who you were just then.

At least we didn’t have snow and ice today.

S: And you had a lovely day, and so that puts all kinds of lovely energy into you, and for you to give out, and that’s really pretty wonderful too.

I was just thinking that the lights aren’t blinding and wondered how that came about. That’s what I thought was different.

These are out.

There are only two on.

S: That’s pretty good. So how are you?


S: Aye? You want to fill any? There’s empty chairs here and there. That looks like a taken chair, but it’s . . .

That is taken by me.

S: And even more and more, aye.

This is a really good month for you. It’s a good month for you because you have the equinox that’s going to be a part of it, and the equinox energy, of course, is all about balance. Balancing time—daylight, dark night—and that also means that because the general energy as a whole within nature is responding to that time of balance, that you are going to have the benefit of some of that balance as well.

So, what in your life needs to be balanced? Now, I’m asking you to think that to yourself for a few minutes. And if you’re not certain, exactly . . .  well, maybe I should ask it of you instead. What do I mean by imbalance? What are the symptoms of in- or out-of-balance?


When you’re dealing with extremes of whatever it is—emotions or whatever is out of balance.

S: Excellent. When you see in your life constant extremes—really good, really bad. They have medication for that now, you know. When you see extremes around you, because the way you’re seeing it is that same extreme. Extremes show that balance is needed. So, sure, that’s a good one.

When you’re going crazy.

S: Is that the good part or the not-so-good part? When you find that you are chasing your tail a little too much, things are getting a bit too stressful. You find yourself behaving in ways that are not sane and safe. And is that most of life as a whole these days? Or when you find yourself going crazy, that’s a symptom that, yes. indeed, balance is needed.

When it’s all work and no play.

S: When it’s all work, no play, or no pray, or no . . .  and when it’s all anything. When most of your focus is being devoted to even good things. I am so happy that this event that you’ve been working for so very long is finally coming about, and there’s all of this great stuff to do and make, and it’s great stuff, but pretty stressful. And everything in your life is being looked at through the filter of how it’s going to function with this event. It’s sort of like a first baby. You had no idea how much everything in your life was going to be coming through the filter of that baby.

So yes, that’s very good. More.

I think balance is kind of like your eyes. When your eyes are functioning properly, you shouldn’t be aware of them. You know, you don’t feel them or anything. I think that’s what balance is like.

S: Nice.

Because everything we’ve heard is like, when you’re out of balance, so I think when you’re in balance, you really just don’t notice it.

S: That’s great. That’s really great. And it’s great because that is one of the most important keys to being able to make change in your life at all.

I cannot count—well, that too, but—the number of times that I have been asked—and to your credit, I will say not so many times lately—but how many times I have been asked “What is it going to feel like when this happens?” Or, “I don’t think I’ve got it because I don’t feel any different,” or “I don’t feel special,” or “I don’t feel powerful.” But the fact of it is—and this is so important—the fact of it is, as David said, you don’t think about your eyes until there’s something wrong with it. You don’t recognize high-frequency energy unless you’re not ready for it. You don’t recognize the “divine power” coming upon you unless it was a mistaken drop meant to be next door. You don’t recognize it because it’s right for you.

Say that word again.


S: It’s normal. Or at least as normal as you can get away with.

So many things in your life you do not value because it doesn’t cause an extreme. A very difficult time that you get over, and you value it because it was so difficult, therefore it must be good.

A blash of flinding light.

S: A blash?

Of flinding light.

S: Flinding light. Yes.

Then you’ll notice that, you know.

S: It’s very easy to work at a lesser frequency so that you can feel that really it is better not to be side-tracked by. So, yes, realizing that normal probably means just fine.

Can you be out of balance and yet feel very good about it? I have all of this creative energy that I’m just filled with it. I’m wanting to do so many things and I don’t have the means to do all of them, and I kind of flip from one to the other, these ideas. Just, you know—went out in the yard today, and I’ve had all this creative energy—I want to do this, I want to do that, I want to do this, and come into the house and I think, “Oh, I need to paint that wall.” I’m just filled with all kinds of creative energy. I don’t know that I’m channeling it properly, but is that being out of balance in a good way?

S: You know, it’s hard to say that it is out of balance or not, because obviously you were able to get away from all of that to come here. Obviously, other parts of your life are functioning without your stopping everything that there is to do these creative projects. So certainly it does not appear that that is the case.

Don’t misunderstand. Passion and enthusiasm, or commitment and responsibility—there are times in your life, because of these things, that you are very focused for quite some time on a particular area of your life, but you recognize that that’s not your pattern.You recognize that, well, once a year the retreat comes up, and Kay is going to be absolutely chasing her tail for three months non-stop—and that’s just the retreat, not including the rest of the life—but you have worked it out so that you are not leaving a trail of dead bodies—well, literally, being that she’s a nurse—because attention wasn’t given in this or that area of life. No, you’ve got things arranged to make that work.

When you are coming upon a holiday such as Mother’s Day—Matthew, what’s it like at the flower shop?

It’s pretty chaotic.

S: Chaotic, yes. That’s a very nice way to say it. Is it chaotic like that all year around?

No, I won’t say all year round, but I’d say there are specific key points. I mean, like, you know, Christmas, and then Valentine’s. There’s several type of holidays that’re just like bam, bam, bam, but then it slows down a little bit during summer.

S: Get a little time to breathe in there now and again, yes?

Well, that’s the sort of an example that there are times that it gets pretty crazy, times where the focus is more on one piece of the life than the other, but it’s not all the time.

You know people—not you, of course—you know people who are dramatic all the time, who always have something taking all of their attention. Very often they are motivated by crisis, and therefore they all the time have crises going on. That isn’t a real effectual way to work, and most of you are very aware that that doesn’t work for you. So you know when you’re out of balance in that way.

Out of balance is a statement of need. What do you need when you are out of balance?


S: And . . . balance . . . and remember now and again being out of balance isn’t all that unusual, but when you are out of balance, it doesn’t feel so good. Make note of that so that you can remember, “This is what happens when I’m not keeping myself . . . ” what? Healthy? Sane? “This is what out-of-balance feels like. I want to be able to recognize this out-of-balance,” and remember that the fact that you can recognize it is a really good thing. The fact that you can recognize it is because it’s not normal.

So back to balance. This time of year, night and day finally start coming to that point where your days are balanced. You have an opportunity to make use of that energy by bringing balance into your life, but that isn’t exactly the big point I was going for, although it takes in that point. I really was going to go for, the reason that you need balance is so that you can grow what’s going to be coming into your life once that equinox is over.

This equinox is a switch out of a very wild ride for most of you. Been a rather tiring time, hasn’t it? And you’re not alone in that. You have tools for helping yourself deal with overwhelm, with being physically, mentally, spiritually tired, out of balance, out of sorts. You have tools—and in a moment I’m going to ask you about them—but the tools are to prepare your personal garden, so to speak—and I’m not giving a garden talk tonight—your personal garden, so to speak, so that you can grow, which is what spring’s energy is all about always.

A very big opportunity for growth is around the corner for you. You want to be in balance, in good balance so that this wonderful opportunity for growth is not having to come through the filter of your chaos. You know what happens when energy comes through chaos, chaos that’s about being overwhelmed, under-fed, spiritually, mentally, physically. You interpret in a negative fashion instead of a positive one, and I will talk a bit more about that as well.

The last eighteen months, give or take a few, have been challenging you, challenging you to better know you. Challenging you to be clear, aware, strong. Have been challenging you to figure out what works for you and what doesn’t work for you. And you have been experiencing, on the outside of your life, an accelerated version of the inside. You’ve not been able to just sweep things under the rug over the last year. The things that you’ve needed to do to be the best you can be have had a very big effect.

Why do I know that? Well, mainly because I’m watching, but I know that because it’s a cosmic energy that’s coming through. It’s energy for transformation.

What has your transformation process been so far? What have you learned about you? What are your strengths? What are your weaknesses? Because you need to know both of them. What do you need to do for those weaknesses to become strengths, and for the strengths to become stronger? What do you need to be the best you know, because the equinox is a change in the energy and it’s going to take the pressure off. And I will tell you, that worries me. Now why would you think that worries me?

Mary Claire.

Well, because you’d like for us to take advantage of the energy that’s giving us momentum to clear out the dross while it’s here, so that, like you said, when the opportunities arise, we are able to function at our highest and best.

S: True. True. More.

Well, in the beginning you said that some of us are motivated by crisis and the pressure that it creates, the intensified energy to change.

S: Yes.

And you see many of us have not used that opportunity to transform ourselves, to function at our best and highest.

S: Precisely so.

And so when the pressure is off, we are not going to be having that extra push to do that unless we make the mental switch to do it, in spite of what’s coming from the cosmos or not.

S: Well said. You’ve got that? Then you can go home now. Aye?

A couple of times in the workshop you were talking about because we need to make it not about ourselves, but about the greater whole, and without the impetus to really change what’s holding us back, then we’re just going to be complaisant in our own little world of non-service.

S: Exactly. There is an advertisement, it’s a television advertisement, in which somebody has built a house around a faucet. Does that sound right?


S: All right, you’re familiar with it. All right. Built a house around a faucet. Odd theory. But Guardians tend to do that. One event—you build your whole story around it. One negative experience—stay away from anything like that. One favored piece of clothing, or teaching, or job, or . . . you build a reality that supports that piece. Why is that a problem?


Well, anytime there is just one thing that you’re focused on, it’s illusion, because it’s just there for a short time.

S: But what if it’s a really good thing? Still illusion?

It’s still illusion.

S: What if it’s a really bad thing?

It’s still illusion.

S: Well, if you’ve got this illusion that you’ve built your whole reality around, and it’s a good thing or a bad thing, how do you change it when you’ve built everything around it, when you have invested so much in that faucet.

I think we do it every day.

S: Hopefully.

For example, for me, this weekend I was just focused on doing all this work, and getting this done, and “Oh, I can’t have any social life.” And Laura said, “Oh, I’ve got these extra tickets to see Yoyo Ma, ” this wonderful cellist. And it hit up against my illusion of, “Oh, this is all I can do this weekend.” And I sat back and looked at it and went, “Wait a minute. I can do that,” and changed my perception of what my life was for that weekend.

S: Aye. Can that very same behavior be a negative behavior.


S: If you are constantly being swayed by offered tickets to—sounds like a child in a grocery store, Yoyo, Ma—yes? Yoyo is a game, yes? All right, maybe it’s not exactly tickets, but if you are constantly swayed by whatever shows up on your doorstep that moment, then it’s very likely you are not going to have successes, and you’re going to become more and more frustrated.

So remember that, in the very same way that a good behavior helps, taken to the extreme—and that’s the key there, taken to the extreme—that same good behavior can be a negative force. How do you know if it’s an extreme?

Good common sense.

S: Good common sense. Well, you know, that’s the problem right there, Sallie. Not so . . .

Not so common.

S: Not so common—yes.

Usually the pain gets bad enough that denial’s broken through, and you see this isn’t for the greatest good, and you wonder why you ever did it in the first place and built the house around the faucet, but at some point it doesn’t work enough, more than it does, and you say, “Oh, I see finally.”

S: That’s right. Now, I’m not talking about gardens, but here comes the garden example. All right. You grow . . .  I don’t know, what? What do you want to grow?


S: All right, you grow watermelon. You grow great watermelon. They are . . .

Seedless. All right. Watermelon is green and red . . .  all right, got it. And somewhere along the line you realize that you’ve really got good watermelons, and therefore you’re going to work on playing with the seeds and working out a strain of consistent watermelons that you can call “Steve’s . . .  again?

Steve’s Melon.

S: Steve Melons. Steve’s Marvelous Melons. [Laughter] They like it. You can direct your energy to creating a unique strain, and put all of your energy and all of your knowledge into keeping that strain healthy, keeping it free from insects, or the rot from rain and the lack of drainage, or any number of things that are sort of running off.

The fact of it is, you are seeking success and motivated by failure. What’s wrong with that? That’s the way the world tends to handle change. You’re seeking success but motivated by failure. I’m telling you that that’s a problem, because what would be better? Not so hard. Here’s the hint.


Seeking success motivated by being successful, and learning from failure.

S: All right. Good. Good. Yes. Be motivated by success. And although you’re not particularly seeking failure, you are certainly aware of it. You are looking at your life, at your garden, at your melons. The pictures you keep sending me! You are looking not because you dread failure, but you’re actually looking to see what needs improvement here. What can be made better here? What might work next time, next batch? Would they come in a batch? Next spring, next planting, something like that. The vine was too drought . . .  was not drought-resistant enough and needs to be more drought-resistant, so I will take the seeds from these melons that have done exceptionally well in spite of it. This is the strain I’m going to focus on. You’re not denying that this didn’t work so well. You’re looking it right in the fact and using it to motivate you to something more. Let’s change and get the good out of it, and keep going.

You can’t do that, you can’t see that, you cannot see the rot in your life if you are so out of balance that you are only focused on one particular thing. And that’s a problem.

“But Samuel, it’s so nice to not be aware at all that anything isn’t working. I sort of like blissful ignorance.” But you cannot make things better, and you continue the need for pain, suffering, failure in your life by not putting your creative attention to them and making them a positive, making them a learning situation which you put to use for what is going well and is good.

Guardians have a hard time doing this. Why do you think? Those who are here to make a difference in this world, to bring about positive change, to help in the activation of the planet itself, the completion of Sacred Status, these individuals have a hard time with this whole balance thing, with the ability to see successes and be motivated by them, and to see failure and be motivated by it. Why do you think it is?


Well, I think we have a strong spiritual push and attachment, and so often the things that are out of balance have to do with form; they have to do with being here on the planet.

S: Good.

Living with whatever we’re living with, and it’s difficult. It almost can make you feel not spiritual when you realize that there are all these physical things you have to take care of in order to function.

S: That’s good, that’s very good.

Mary Claire.

There’s also, that [which] goes along with being a Guardian is the whole concept of impeccability, and so when one stumbles, well, it seems like a clear indication that we’re not being impeccable. And maybe that’s true, maybe not. Maybe it’s just part of the process. But there’s a tendency—and I may just be speaking for myself—but there’s a tendency to be hard on oneself when one does stumble, fall down, skin one’s nose. And to get up again is, of course . . .  takes a great deal of strength, and I have to work very hard at, when I do fall, to not beat myself up because of the whole spiritual perspective, “Of course you can do this! Why not? You can do this.” And you end up messing it up. So for me it’s working very hard to get back up again, and it’s always a challenge of balancing this whole push for impeccability and also my humanness at the same time.

S: It doesn’t occur to too many Guardians that when they hear that wee, small voice pushing them to ever higher and higher frequencies of life, to now and again look it square in the face and say, “Shut up already!” Because the fact of it is, if you were to be perfect all the time, you would be useless here.

[ . . . ]

S: Relief through the room. No, you’ve heard me say this. You know it to be so. You force upon yourself an unnecessary standard, and it is done so that you can slow yourself down.

You need to take a look at that. When all of your life flows through the filter of “I fell down and skinned my nose. I am so useless. I am so unable to function. I am always doing things wrong. I am not . . . I am not . . .  I am not . . . ” Well, you see, what you are is focusing totally on yourself without any hope for something positive to come out of it. Guardians are very hard on themselves. Because you know [that] you know. You know what was needed in this situation, but you sat back and kept your mouth shut, and it caused a problem. And so you just smack yourself on the forehead, and you kick yourself several times, and you back away from those things that would put you in a place where you might have authority and leadership, because you know what a great failure you are in that department. And everything in your life is coming through that filter, through that faucet. Your whole reality is built around the faucet of failure.

[ . . . ]

S: Exactly. There is no balance in that.

I cannot give you three steps to perfect balance, because, you see, every one of you already has the tools that take you there. And the biggest tool—already mentioned—is: you’re not happy; things aren’t working out; you’re in chaos—mild chaos, huge chaos, doesn’t matter. You are aware that something’s not right. Physically you are exhausted, and you know “I should be eating better. I should be exercising. I should be . . . should be . . . should be . . .  should be . . .  You hear all of that. You’ve got it there. Rather than taking action, you just feel sort of overwhelmed. Mentally, emotionally speaking “I should not have thought that! I should not be feeling like this! I’m angry—oh no!”

Balance is a reprieve, but you’ve got to want it. So the thing that holds you back from that valuable function of balance in your life, what holds you back from it [ . . . ] give up all of your time at work. “Samuel, that would mean that I should quit it, right?” Gracious, there would never be a Guardianship Program if that was the answer. No, it doesn’t mean you should quit it. You should see where the problem is. What is it that changes things? What takes you from happily doing the work that you’re there to do to overload all the time? What is it?

Stuart has said that packing is the Form’s kryptonite. Kryptonite. That is like Achilles heel, yes? Kryptonite. All right, so what’s your kryptonite.


I was going to ask you about The Guardianship Program. A lot of people are taking that, and for me personally it just seems like an additional pressure on my life, which adds an element that throws me off balance. And what you’re saying about you want to have balance, and feeling like The Guardianship Program is much more stuff to do, I’m having a hard time seeing the two things going on at the same time.

S: How long does The Guardianship Program last?

A long, long time.

S: Every year it gets longer and longer. Twelve weeks. Obviously twelve very long weeks for you. Twelve weeks. You have made a commitment to take part in the particular form of discipline and exercise for twelve weeks. That’s the key—twelve weeks. What am I saying here?

It’s time-limited.

S: Again.

It’s time-limited.

S: One of the things that that’s saying is . . .

There’s a beginning and an end.

S: Yes. It’s not something you’re taking on that you’re obligated to for the rest of your life. I wish. It’s something that you’ve taken on for a particular period of time. Remember that. Look at what’s causing difficulty. Are you taking on an intense program for twelve weeks, but at the very same time have taken on in every other part of your life an intense program that goes, maybe, not twelve weeks. Maybe four weeks for this one, and eight months for that one, and the rest of your life for this one, this one and this one. Your kryptonite in that case is not looking at the larger picture, not allowing yourself to see “I’ve got to back off somewhere.”

Now, with too many Guardians, a really sad thing happens, really sad thing happens. They let go of what’s easiest to let go of, and most of the time that’s their spiritual practice. Most of the time it’s the very things that are their absolute life-saving salvation through most of the year. You let go of that which feeds you and helps you and holds your hand when you cross the mean street, because it’s the easiest to let go of. And that’s a mistake.

You know, to kind of respond to your question, Kathy, and just an example from my own life, is I know that when I was in Seattle—and even though it was a great thing that I was creating change in the programs that I was building, and the volunteer work and the books, and all stuff—but as I over-committed myself, with every step I became less available to me, so what happened in turn was that I felt like I didn’t have a choice when I did. So now I’m trying to stay very conscious—and I’ve said this in The Guardianship Program—about really being a choice with the things I say yes to, so that I can truly give it me.

S: Good.

And so, this time with The Guardianship Program, instead of thinking of things like “I should” or “supposed to do,” I said, “I said yes, and so obviously there’s a gift here for me.” So then that frame or that perspective allows me to really not feel over-burdened, and not also . . .  I mean pretty much everybody in my life knows I said yes, because I’m, like, a new, celebrating, crazy person, and so at work they . . .  you know, I’m not saying I’m totally ecstatic about no sugar, and so everybody will probably be happy when I can eat it again at work, but I’m very aware that it’s not an external force making me do that.

S: Good.

And paying attention to what I’m gaining.

S: Excellent. Excellent. Lovely. Lovely.

Come the equinox, if you do not have balance in your life, you are going to have a very hard time dealing with the switch of energy. You have been in a type of hibernation, metaphorically speaking, making a lot of changes, and a lot of awarenesses that are going to come to the top and in the open. Opening doors, giving you choices to make. “Oh no! Oh no! Decisions.” You need balance in your life now to create a life to celebrate for the rest of this year.

Look into your personal tool box. What makes you happy? What are you good at? What feeds you? What are your weaknesses? What are the kryptonites of your pathway? What are the things that throw you out of balance? What changes can you bring into your life to bring positive balance? Is it physical work? To do with your health? To do with your surroundings? To do with your work? Physical things. Is it beliefs? Thoughts? Those that you surround you with, do they have positive thoughts? Do they have functional beliefs? And spiritually, once again, what feeds you?

Balance now to open the doorway to successes tomorrow. This should be the best year of your life—so far. Theory is, they just keep getting better once you’ve had a really good one. Nothing stops it from being the best but your lack of balance causing an inability to function. Change it now.