Replace, Reframe, And Renew

June 4, 2006

Samuel: Well greetings, dears.

Hi Samuel.

S: You’re getting so good at this. Good for you. All right, how have you been? Feeling good? Managing through all of the interesting experiences life is bringing your way these days? Look at you. Ready for that which comes next?

Better be.

S: I like the part where this is what I see . . .

[To Sanat] Hello, darling. Now, I cannot believe that you’re being shy with me, who has known you since before you were born.

Does he still talk to you?

S: Not so much. [To Sanat] But you always can, always, even when you forget how. Just ask some of the people in this room. They’ll tell you it’s not so hard.

So, this is a time of great magic. Why?

Because you said so.

S: If only that could be enough to create that, but no, that’s not it. Why?

Because there’s great chaos?

S: Actually, darling, for hitting the bottom line that fast, you’re absolutely right. Because this is a time of great chaos, which is exactly what you were going to say wasn’t it? Exactly, of course it was. And what is it that chaos and magic have to do with each other?

Creation.

S: Both are a function of creation energy, which leads me to ask, What are you creating these days? What are you creating these days? Now, what you are creating shows itself up in one version as what you are consciously doing to establish creativity. Now, a good example of establishing creativity would be this [indicating flower arrangement]. This is an amazing act of creation, of great beauty, of conscious creativity, yes? What are others? Remember the question is what are you doing to create these days? You put it down, Kay? Mary Claire.

Well, there are so many, just an endless number of ways that one can do that. One of the ones that comes into my mind that I’m doing is finding creative ways of marketing things. Something in particular, a project, finding a way to market it, to communicate in a way to make that connection to my audiences, whether it be in speaking, whether it be in marketing a product or whatever. It’s a highly creative act that I never realized the potential before.

S: Creating a way to put your creation into the world, I like that. Sounds good. Aye, love.

One of the ways I’m creating is by balancing that which is needed so that may . . . it’s for me a balancing [of my] finances, time with family, self-care, time with friends, finding ways to give time to Phoenix, all those things that are important in my life, but doing it in a way that does not throw me out of balance.

S: Are you saying dear, that creation can be a function of balance, that balance allows for more creation?

I was thinking that, yes.

S: And you should take note of it because that’s very wise and very true, absolutely. Quick aside, all right? Still coming back [later] to what are you creating these days, [a] quick aside: at this time of extremes—have you noticed?—at this time of extremes, your balanced day-to-day life is more important than it’s ever been? What does that balance mean? Steven, say again some of the things that you’re working to bring balance to.

Financial stability.

S: All right.

Relationships within the family.

S: Good.

Relationships with friends.

S: Good.

Self-care in terms of time alone and body care, exercise and diet.

S: Good.

And service, time with Phoenix.

S: Good. And although he meant to mention it also, work and . . . the areas of your life that make up your life. And if you’re wondering what they are, perhaps you have been feeling so out of balance that you don’t even know what areas to put balance into. One easy way to figure out what they are is to keep a time-diary for two or three days when you see what you’re doing. Another way to do that is to look at perhaps a picture of your day. “These are the things I do, and therefore this is what makes up a typical day for me.”

Knowing what goes on in your life sounds like one of the most simple, pitiful things that could be said. How could you not know what’s going on in your life? And the laughter you’re hearing is not because people are agreeing with “That’s really a stupid statement.” They are saying, “That’s exactly how it is.” You get so busy that you’re not paying attention; you’re simply functioning, well, sometimes by rote, sometimes by will. Getting that balance gives your brain enough time to figure out what’s next. So take a look at that idea of creating some balance in your life. Now, I’m still on this aside. With that balance, what does that mean? How do you get balance? What is it you’re doing to make balance? Mary.

You have to consciously see what is important and prioritize it, and then take action to do that.

S: You’ve got to figure out what’s important, and I’m going to embellish a bit. Figure out how much time you need to do these important things, and by doing that alone you’re going to see a list of other things that aren’t quite as important, and you’re going to be able to see that a little less time here will give me a little more there. What might be an easy example of something like that?

Not working as much overtime when asked.

S: Not working as much overtime, sure. That can be helpful.

Watch less TV. Exercise more.

S: Exercise more. Less television. That’s the couch potato, right?

Right, you got it.

S: You don’t want to know what I almost came out with, but it wasn’t furniture rutabagas. Aye.

One of the ways that I see myself doing it these days is by removing clutter that’s taking up a lot of my time, whether it’s a disorganized pantry, or my garage, or my paperwork, or anything that’s taking more time than it should. Just because it sits, I just let it not be organized anymore.

S: And what is the good of being organized? Why is it good to have your pantry organized?

Because I know what is where, so I just get to it. I don’t spend a lot of time, emotional energy, trying to figure out things. And I also feel like I am uncluttering my life to make time for something else as I do that.

S: Good. Good.

And I was doing my pantry today, I said, “Okay I’m uncluttering to let more nurturing energy into my life,” because that’s what pantry is about, it nurtures. And when I do my garage, it’s about my movement. When I do my finances, it’s about my energy in the light and in this world, and things like that. So, it helps me set the energy for more than just the physical house.

S: Excellent. Excellent. And that is a really powerful idea that you can make use of as well. When you are doing any act in your life, move it up into Sacred Status. And what I mean by that is give it a more powerful connotation. “I am de-cluttering this drawer. I’m doing something good for myself, but by de-cluttering here, I am symbolically de-cluttering those things that get in the way of my being the best I can be. I’m de-cluttering my mind of beliefs that don’t work. I’m . . . “ With what you need, and what works for you, you can do that and—you’re not going to like this so get prepared—doing that is not likely to automatically create that de-cluttered psyche. Darn! But what it will do is start letting your brain know that you are on the path to it. Why is it a good idea for your brain to be in agreement with your heart, your thought, your actions? Why is that? And really, that’s a question.

S: Cindy

Because if it’s not in agreement, it’s always going, “Heh, heh, you’re out of line. Heh. Heh.”

S: That’s exactly right. That’s exactly right, and you’re going to manifest that final product because you’ve got more working with you. You’ve got more of you working with you.

Simple as those sound, they are profound. Balance in your life is a good and, I’m sorry to say, necessary action that you can do for yourself to initiate creation energy, which is going to be very helpful for you over the next few months. So I’m going to move back now to, What are you doing to create?

I spend a little time every day knitting or sewing, or doing something that I enjoy doing that involves color or fabrics, or something like that. And also, we put in a big garden this year, and it’s really a creative process . . .

S: Yes indeed.

. . . to watch it come up and see what happens to it.

S: Yes indeed. You sort of have an “in,” not only because you are married to a farmer . . .

He’s working very hard out there.

S: . . . but also because you’ve worked with elemental energy for years and years. So you’re getting more out of creative gardening, creative activity, because of that too, and that means you’re getting greater strength in other areas of your life, and that’s also good.

The reason creation energy is so important right now is exactly as David said earlier. Your world right now is in a whole lot of chaos, and when the world is in chaos—whether it is chaos that directly affects you or not—when you are in a world that’s experiencing chaos, things tend to get—no better way to say this—faster. Faster. You start losing time. You start fraying, get wound too tight. Anybody here been wound too tight lately?

And that, finally, is where I am going tonight. [It’s] about one of the most important, simple things you can do to get yourself unwound enough to be you, to be you.

[Aside] It’s lovely to have you here.

Tell me about stress. “Stress is my friend. I cultivate the relationship.” Mary Claire.

Stress, when I experience it, makes me really controlling because I feel like there are parts that [it] might not be that I can control that create stress, and then I get controlling more in the areas that I know I can control. So that makes me less myself.

S: A very natural human response to stress is to begin controlling things around you, because with stress you feel out of control. There are pressures upon you causing you to have to do things or think things or . . . that you have no control over. It’s one of those lovely areas of life in which somebody else’s pathway is crossing yours and they are ruling at the moment. Maybe that’s a boss, or a mate, or a friend, or even a part of you—that child or that old grump, or that . . . I was not looking at anyone specific there! Jason says “He’s talking about you.”

I was thinking about that as the same sentence.

The grump and the child.

S: And you do not feel that you are able to make decisions, take action that’s needed to bring back your equilibrium. Now, one thing that that says is, take a look at your equilibrium. What is it that gets you off balance? And take a look at those things so that you can be ready when they show up. If you know that when you get up at five o’clock after not sleeping most of the night, you are going to have a full day of being with people you don’t particularly enjoy, and they’re going to be causing you to push, push, push, push, push and on and on and on. Some of you could fill in some of the most horrific schedules and lives in which you really don’t seem to have a whole lot of control. So you run, run, run all the way through that day, not taking care of yourself, taking care of all kinds of other people—even at this young age—being everything to everyone, making sure that you do it all perfectly, being compulsive about it, in fact.

The Form’s always saying that she loves to work with compulsive perfectionists. I don’t.

This is a very natural reaction. You stress, and to get out of that life-threatening stress, you begin looking to where you can take control in little areas of your life. If you’re really desperate, you start tying your shoes in a very special way. You start taking control where you can get it. And, Mary Claire, I have a question for you: by any chance, has that taking control ever sort of backfired?

Oh sure, absolutely. What’s interesting about it is just yesterday I got a reminder of that from a stranger. I was stuck in . . .

S: Oh, well now, that’s nice.

Yes. I mean, just like an angel in my life, and I thanked him for it. But I was stuck in a traffic jam for forty minutes to go one mile. And I had all these things mapped out that I wanted to do yesterday, and it was completely out of my control. And I found myself getting a little stressed, not angry, but just like, getting kind of a little uptight. “I’m just sitting here and there’s nothing I can do about it.”

S: Just a moment. Can anybody in here relate to this?

And I got to the grocery store, one of my stops, and the produce man was there putting produce out, and I’d seen him several times before and I smiled at him and he smiled back. And he said, “How are you today?” And I said, “I’m doing really well. I’m just a little bit stressed from the . . . out in front of the grocery store [there’s] traffic because they’re resurfacing the road.” And he goes, “Well, in my world, that’s just little stuff. That’s not important at all.” He said, “There are so many things that are so much more important than that.” And I said, “You know, I like your world, and I live in that world, and I’m not in it right now, and thank you so much for that reminder, because I really needed that.” And it was just perfect. He just reminded me, you know, the world I need to be in was . . . I’m just there, and it’s not important.

S: Mary Claire walked off, and he was never to be seen again. That is lovely. That is lovely.

What happens to you when you’re in stress?

I find myself . . . although stresses are real events, good and bad, it’s not just negative things, but I realize that it’s my perception of those events. And every time that I can reframe—which is sometimes difficult because that means staying in the moment—reframe those events and realize that it’s how I’m seeing them and not at all, necessarily, how they’re impacting my life. I’m choosing to see them in a way that’s getting me a little stressed.

S: That is a perfect transition point for me, perfect.

I hear my dogs being sad.

Oma wants freedom.

No, Oma wants Sanat.

S: Oma says her human is betraying her. Vernon, will you just tell her she’s all right? Tell her she’s all right. Say, “It’s all right.” Thank you. Don’t mess with my dogs.

Now Heidi—as therapists will do—used a phrase? What phrase?

Reframe.

S: Reframe, yes. What does that mean?

Well, to look at a situation a little differently, and what I do is try and make it more positive.

S: Aye. I’m going to push that just a little further. Have you ever framed something? Have you ever done it really badly, and then literally, reframed it well? And the only reason that I’m pushing that very simplistic point is because it will help you remember that looking at life now and again, it looks a whole lot like a really bad picture. And it might not be the picture at all, and in fact most of the time it’s not. It is a matter of reframing, looking from a different perspective. And the reason that that’s a transition point for me here is because that, that has more to do with your becoming at peace. And I promise you, this is going to sound like too big of a statement, but it’s the fastest way for you to reach that healthy, wealthy and wise place. Now, sorry, it might not do so much for body fat, but the healthy, wealthy wise. Mary.

I was going to say earlier, when you said what were we trying to create, and one of the things I’m trying to do at work is to create more positive environments so that when it does get stressful, we all kind of move through it and enjoy it versus it being a downer and more stress.

S: Can you imagine how nice it would be to work for her? Really.

Creation energy is what you need. Chaos is what you have. Putting yourself into the practice of working with creation force by bringing balance into your life creatively, is going to help remove some of the stress that is keeping you from being able to use creation energy when it is there for you to use it. One of the best ways to begin relieving that stress in your life that comes from the chaos that is going on right now. Chaos is not a bad thing. Don’t ever be fooled into thinking that it is. Chaos simply is chaos. And I will assure you that one person’s chaos is another person’s organized pantry. The way that you look at it makes a difference, but that’s not where the reframing is.

You’ve got that picture, and you don’t like the way it looks. It doesn’t do anything to you. It does not draw you into it. It even backs you off from it. And although I’m not necessarily talking about [the] Mona Lisa, I am—Mona Lisa, yes?—I am talking about the little pictures of every moment of your life. You step back from it, and you say, “You know, it isn’t really that the . . . “—help me with a pantry here—” . . . the cereal is out of place, and the soup is scattered all over the place. That’s not it at all. It’s that there’s nothing bringing out the best.”

In your life, some of your greatest stress comes because you are no longer able to see the best. You have this picture in front of you and you do all of the tricks—what are the tricks? You step back and squint your eyes and see what you see the most of? Is that right?

Yes.

S: Really? That’s not necessarily going to change anything though. What will change it is when you are able to look at that picture—and again, please remember I am saying picture, photograph, painting, but I’m talking life. The day at work, the relationship that you spend the most time in. That would be you and you. And it’s really a shame how much you abuse that relationship. You look at that picture and you look to see what draws you. Is it a particular color? What’s good about that situation? What’s good about this picture? When you forget how to see what is good you accelerate your aging, this aging—heart, mind. Looking to see what’s good is, right now, one of the most important things you can be doing. Looking to see what is good is a habit you need to develop for functioning in this world.

And I have a reminder for you of that very thing. Gayle and Charlotte, can you help me here?

Be careful. It’s got thorns.

S: Good. And Gayle says, “Well should they be stripped off?” No! That’s the point. What is this?

A rose stem.

It’s a reminder.

S: It’s a reminder, and you’re going to get one. [To one in the audience] Would you, however it would most efficiently do it, pass them around? Into every life a few leaves must fall. Here is my point with this, this wonderful gift I am giving you. Matthew, Lillibeth, Frank, think of this as my birthday present to you.

You spend a lot of your life enjoying the flowers. And I do not want you to misunderstand. Sometimes looking for the positive, looking for the good, means you’ve got to look at the flowers, simply to get yourself back into the routine of being able to see what’s good. But seeing the flower, well, that’s easy. It’s so easy, in fact, that it’s quite easy to fall into [a] habit and start living your life, life that is more precious and important than you can know while you’re here. You start forgetting—one down—how to deal with things while you’re looking at those beautiful flowers. Because, you see, here’s the thing about this world: there are—thank you, love—there are lots of beautiful flowers in your day-to-day life. And many of you have done an awful lot to ensure that you have those flowers you can look at. And when it happens that the flower begins to fade, you don’t have anything left. But there is so much more in life than that, and if all you ever do is look at the flower, if all you ever look at is only what’s going on in this picture, you’re not ever going to understand what it’s about. You’re not ever going to be able to make use of it in your life. You’re not ever going to be able to grow further. You’re going to be at a plateau. How many of you like being on plateaus? None of you. Another word for plateau [is] dead. You’re not growing, you’re dead. It’s way too easy to forget that there is more to life so that you do not see the beauty, even the need for the rest of the flower.

Now that’s not saying that you should go out and seek a few painful and difficult experiences. Those come your way often enough. You really don’t need to go looking for them. But, when you’re in that reframing process, when you step back from looking at the picture, recognize that what you’re looking at is what has drawn you the most, and ask yourself, “Am I leaving anything out?”

Catherine Tuggle, when you are framing one of your outstanding pictures, do you always set it up based on the most predominant color you’ve got going in the picture? In fact, probably not very often. Sometimes it’s the little things—a small leaf, a little branch—that by giving it the attention is going to change the whole view, reframe [it]. Sometimes it’s the painful things. Does anybody here have a stem that does not have any of these lovely painful things? Well here, darling, let’s trade that in. Anyone else? Oh, Steven, you were the only one, sitting there thinking that his dreams had come true. Handing him the thorns now.

Now, a question for a florist: when you are selling your roses, do you make sure that everybody has their fair share of thorns?

No.

S: No? Whatever do you do?

Strip them.

S: You strip them. And I would imagine that there are even instruments that are particularly designed to make that easy, yes? Those are the things that when you say, “Samuel, life’s so hard and nothing’s going right. I do the five-minute meditation, and I’m eating well, and I’m living love as much as I can, and I’m doing everything I can, right? I’m using the tools and the techniques and I still have thorns. Thorns! Can you imagine?” And what is it I usually say?

Good.

S: Good. Really good. Because one thing that means is you’re not dead. Another thing that means is you are forced into a reframe. What is the ultimate way to know that you are at least—and I’m saying this for the human mind’s sake—at least ninety-five percent over a really rough patch in life? What?

Gratitude.

Be grateful for it.

S: You’ve become grateful for it. You’ve expressed gratitude. You’ve reached the point where you recognize that the thorn is a part of the whole. You’re not spending your life resisting the thorns, which actually—ultimately— is putting way too much energy into those thorns by doing that. So there. Gratitude for the thorns.

So in the very same way that I started this evening asking you, “What are you doing? What are you creating?” I’m going to ask you what are the thorns in your life? [I] don’t want you answering that [out loud]. That’s one of those questions you don’t have to answer. Say it.

Rhetorical.

S: Rhetorical. I was getting it as retto-recal, and then that piece of the Form sitting in here is saying, “No, it’s not retto-recal.” But I did not know exactly what it was, but it’s not retto-recal.

What are the thorns in your life? Human nature does not like to focus on thorns. You are instinctually designed to seek successes, and you think of thorns as failures. Why are you instinctually designed to seek successes? Very easy, don’t think deep.

So you’ll survive.

S: Yes, this worked, do it again. This worked, do it again. This did not work. Try never to do that again. Bear [is] bad. The thorns become something to be run away from, something to ignore. And what happens whenever you try to ignore something?

It comes back.

S: It starts following you around.

I dream about it.

S: You dream about it. You see it in other people’s scenarios. You see it in all of your other scenarios. The thorns are there for a purpose. Hear me carefully please. There is nothing in your life that you cannot be grateful for. Everything in your life has a purpose. And the purpose that you’re able to gain out of it today is going to lead to something else tomorrow, and something else tomorrow from there. What you see it as today can also change tomorrow, and what you see as the gratitude, the growth you’ve recognized from it, also changes. It’s not a—well, I almost said stable thing, but that sort of implies that you tend to be unstable doesn’t it? I’ll go with it anyway. Your ability to accept the thorns makes the thorns disappear. Your gratitude changes [it]. You are baking a cake. You do not have milk. Do you put milk in a cake? You do not have milk, so you look to see what you do have. What would be a substitute?

Coca-Cola. There are Coca-Cola cakes.

S: That’s a really scary thought. You do not have milk so you say, “I know, I will use a Coca-Cola.” And you do that in your life a thousand different ways every day, and suddenly develop amnesia when it comes to the thorns. You forget to replace. And you replace, starting by—say the word, Heidi.

Reframing.

S: By reframing. I don’t love it, but the fact of it is, in your life, you grow more from the thorns than you do from the flowers. Mastery is when it doesn’t take every thorn on the stem.

This is a time of extremes, and in your lives—in every portion of your lives—you are seeing those extremes. It’s hard to bring balance, but the reason that it’s hardest to bring balance is because you are focused on avoiding the thorns, or on the pain the thorns bring you—which sort of focuses you right back on the thorns again, doesn’t it?—and forgetting that it’s all there to help you. And when you cannot see how it helps you, it’s time to do two things. What are they? I’ll give you a hint. I just said them. Heidi, help.

Reframing and give gratitude.

S: Well actually, the give gratitude is the product of it. Reframe and what?

Replace

S: Replace. And the easiest way to do that is while you’re looking for what worked, you give gratitude for being able to see the parts that worked, even though right now you can’t see the parts that did not work.

[Cell phone rings] And they’re such lovely tunes too, aren’t they?

You have in front of you a magic wand. It looks like cast-off rose stem. It’s given to you as a reminder that at this time, when it seems like there can be more chaos than you are comfortable with, more stress than you are happy with, at a time in which there are a lot of wonderful things going on, but a lot of things that are just hard to deal with, you can get caught in a spiral that takes your health, takes your focus, takes your ability to function in tiny piece by tiny piece, until you don’t realize that all that’s left is just the mechanical doing of everyday life, survival.

Look at the thorns. Yes, look at the thorns in your life. Look at the hard parts. Look at the difficulties and begin replacing the way you see them. Consciously try it tomorrow. You could do it tonight, but we’ll give you a break. How about tomorrow?

When something comes to you that you find yourself functioning just sad, angry, tense, depressed, bereaved, grieving, forlorn, angry, outside of your usual loving self, give yourself a moment and look at the thorns. Look at how and why you are grateful for them. I’m not saying seek pain, I’m not saying seek pain. I’m saying see it all and be grateful.

There’s too many ways in this world to hide. Courage. Sometimes it is as bad as you think, but most of the time, your “think” was filled with fear, and that “think” was running you, and that was what made it bad. Replace by reframe equals renew. Here’s your title.

Glochanumora. Happy trails.