May 6, 2007

Samuel: Hello, dears. Has it been a good month for you? Maybe it’s time to take a break. Not that kind of break, though. How are you sleeping these days, particularly maybe the last week?

Better.

S: Good. Good!

Restless. Cats. Walking on my chest, talking.

S: It’s time to start exercising them. Make them too tired. Would you consider bringing in a mouse? Just kidding. It would scare the mouse too much. Might even scare your cat.

Well, it occurred to me that you would be combined. Some that were having pretty good sleep, some that were having pretty bad sleep, but extremes. Not your usual at any case. And why would I be thinking that? What’s going on?

Extremes.

S: Well, generally extremes.

Well, hello dear. And should I tell you why all my dogs are here? Oma is a very gifted dog; she has the ability to tell me what your energy is doing. So as she wanders around and gives you a sniff, or settles here and there, she is telling me what to pay attention to. What’s really great is when she starts running in these beautiful, dance-like circles, going [bark imitation]. Not bad, eh? Which has to do with one of two things: either, there has to be an energy change immediately, or there has just been an energy change immediately, because she responds in the same way to both of those.

Now, Hapi is in prison.

Restrained.

S: Well, and that’s probably for the best, eh? Yes, he wants to go to his Auntie Sharon. Hapi’s purpose actually has nothing to do with you, I’m very sorry to say, and everything to do with me. Hapi thinks that he’s here to torture Sanat. He likes that there’s someone he can look eye-to-eye at and who can’t make him get in a down-stay. Hapi’s purpose is—I believe he would say his purpose is—to come up here and guard me from Oma, and that means that the front row may be quite startled if he decides to hop up and say, “Go away!” His is just to soak in the energy. You don’t want a dog that should be as sensitive as he having a difficult time around high energy situations. It can be unpleasant.

Now, we have something very special tonight. The newsletter interview was just complete, but after finally getting me to be quiet after two or so hours, there still were questions that had not been answered, so I said, “Well, there has not been “Questions and Answers” in some time, how about we finish them up here?” So I suggested that David and Paula, or David, or Paula, come up and read them. You know—perhaps there are some who may not—that David and his lovely wife, Paula, are the editors of the newsletter. [Applause] And although that was kind and polite, I think most of you should be standing up and cheering that it is not you [laughter], because it is indeed very hard work and you do an amazing job. You know that I don’t change the way I speak when I am giving the interview, which means that in the very big circles that I tend to work in, they are Paula is transcribing it, they are editing it, and they are making me sound intelligent. I think you are a great gift not only to the work but to me. So, if there’s time after that, there’s a little something I want to toss on your plate, but that’s only if there’s time. Aye? Let’s go! You ready for this? And do you have any water?

DT: Paula brought me a glass up.

S: Of course she did.

DT: I didn’t school myself in the flip, though.

S: But you told me you would.

DT: I was afraid the pressure would make all the difference, so I brought some simulated questions along so I could try it. [Demo]

S: And the idea of course if that all of you close your eyes just a little so none of it hits you in the face. But, got one more? See if you can make it flip more out that way. I’m not so sure. Paula, you might need to come up. He could make them trash balls and throw them at you. Or what is it that small children in school do? They spit into it and throw it?

[Audience explains spit balls]

S: I’m so sorry. How many people in here used to do that? It’s a very small but not surprising group. [Laughter] So the first one is . . .

“Samuel. After the retreat, I know someone had my name on a candle and was sending me energy, but quite honestly I couldn’t tell that I felt it. That leaves me feeling insensitive, but I know that’s a harsh comparative judgment that doesn’t serve me anymore. What exercises or attitudes would you recommend to someone like me to reinforce the sense I am ‘getting it.’”

S: All right. That question’s over. [DT flips the card] The reason that’s such a good question is because it’s constantly coming up. And it’s constantly coming up because it’s touching you at a real important security level. There’s so much in this world that you’re only beginning to know. Every day you’re faced with unknowable, unseeable, unhearable—and I think if I say unspeakable that will end up meaning something altogether different, won’t it?—unsound-able maybe, things and you have to make your way through the maze of the world without getting too hurt by those things. You spend a whole lot of your life as a result of that doing everything you possibly can to be able to control every tiny bit of your world you can. Even if you’re not certain if it’s something you can control, you give it a good try because there’s so many things you can’t. And with those controlling impulses comes a sense that anything that is deeply meaningful to you, anything that is yours, you should have control of it. Therefore, if you are a magnificent being of light and love and power and joy, if you are a piece of Source living in this world as an example of love, then you should be able to feel it when energy is sent your way because your magnificent self should be able to just be at a place where it recognizes itself. But it doesn’t work that way. It doesn’t work that way because why?

Because you’re in it all the time.

S: Because you’re in it all the time. That’s perfect. It doesn’t work that way because—just for a moment I want you to think about, can you tell when the person’s breath next to you has gotten into your air space? Well, actually there might be a couple of you that can tell, but that had more to do with their dinner than it had to do with . . . at which point is Gwendolyn’s air merging with Kathy’s. And when it does, can you feel it? Does it make you tingle? Do you just feel filled with light and a real sock of love right to your heart when that happens? Because you know, it’s part of All That Is, isn’t it? And yet you don’t. Why is it you don’t? Because it’s a natural part of you, which is the point. If Chris is sending Kathy energy, I hope she doesn’t rely on feeling it to think she’s getting it because that would say two things. One of the things it would say is that she’s not recognizing that that energy is already a part of her, that the manifestation of it is already there, it’s already happened. It would mean that she has separated from that greater self, and that would be a real shame. And the other one is that she is judging herself or Chris as not sending it good enough, or not receiving it well enough. And of course both of those will only bring you pain. When you spend your life waiting for the feeling to come to affirm your knowledge, you’re in big trouble. Your feelings will fool you. Your gut can get you in trouble, don’t you know it? Your emotional needs are based on beliefs that may or may not be working for you. Your feelings are based on a perspective that may or not be true. This sounds like a country song, doesn’t it? Aye.

Since I’m one of those, I’d like to know when other people do feel that, what’s going on with them? What is it . . . there’s something different here.

S: I’ll tell you what it is—I’ll tell you what I’d say it is. I’m looking for an example here. Lillibeth, is that a coat behind you? What color is it?

Red

S: Red. And Steven, what color is your shirt?

Orange.

S: And Catherine, what color is yours?

Red.

S: Red. Would the three of you stand up except I need your coat. Now, how is it possible for Steven to say his is orange and Catherine to say hers is red when Lillibeth’s is red?

[…]

S: Saturation levels. Thank you. Why did I ask an artist? Now what’s my point here? What’s my point with that? “What is it these people are experiencing,” was Louise’s question, “when they say they’re getting it, when they’re getting this thing that I want to feel, too, but I’m not?” And what did I give you as an example but these three? What am I saying? Paula?

Well, it’s a different interpretation of what the word red means. It’s that person’s particular slant on what that category is.

S: Right. Exactly right. Now, another version of that. Hmmm. This one’s risky, so at the Cancer Center, when you work with patients that are in there, are there those that experience pain in a vastly different level than others?

Oh, Lord, yes.

S: Oh, Lord, yes. And that may mean that something that for one person is just a little irritating is quite painful for another, yes? And something that might be unspeakable can be bearable for another. Yes? Am I saying you’re all sick? No, but the point is still there. What’s the difference? Same amount of pain, two totally different reactions to it, two totally different labels that go on it. Something that is a major impact just goes by. Something that is little stuff has big impact. What’s that about? It’s about: you are not only you, individual you, but in addition to that you have given yourself a whole language for your particular experiences. What might be just a little tickle to you might be a big shiver to someone else. I would never say that somebody who has reached the lofty heights of the mountaintop so that they are capable of receiving the highest and best energies and feeling it chill them, and thrill them—going back to that song, aren’t I?—I would never say their experience isn’t true. But I will say this, because it is true for them. But what I will say is, you cannot judge what they’ve gotten because of their experience. You learn you. You learn what works for you. Worry about that. Don’t worry about the others.

I used to be one who was worried about it because I used to never feel anything, see anything, hear anything, and once when I did ask that I would like to see, and I did feel or see or I don’t even remember, and it was so distracting in the middle of toning and, I said, “Oops! I never want it again!” So it might be a gift that I don’t feel it because it can get in the way, and it can become a way by which I judge myself if I get it or don’t get it.

S: And it would be helpful if you would tone next to Louise so that when it bounces off of you going the other way it might bounce onto you and that would be nice, wouldn’t it?

“Even though this question is improbable and might sound like a joke, I would appreciate having an idea of what ascension might entail. At the retreat, you alluded to the fact that some of us might ascend or die, but you would prefer if we ascended. The question is, should we ascend, how will our families know that we’ve ascended and not just know that we’ve been abducted by terrorists? Do we leave greasy spots that indicate ascension or do we always ascend in front of others who can contact our families? Or will we know beforehand that ascension is about to occur?”

S: Now you know you’re laughing at someone’s life here! They’re worried about this and they’re concerned about what their families will say because they’ll miss them.

And how do you get the greasy spots out of the carpet?

S: Do you use Resolve? Resolve, yes! Very good. And I was noticing, darling, that between your legs you’ve got a red blinking light and was wondering if you were advertising. Does it say anything when it does that? [Dog growls] That’s right. See, she’s chasing her tail. That one’s for me. All right, I’ll go.

Here is the problem. Ascension isn’t a mass disappearance. I think that you’re watching somebody else’s movies for that. It’s not when the mother ship finally arrives and you all get sucked up. It’s not you’re driving down the road and the trumpet sounds and all of a sudden your car is driving without you. Scary kind of thought, don’t you think? And it’s not going to be hidden by some sort of mass atomic destruction that vaporizes so many people they never see again that they just have to assume that you were vaporized and instead you were ascended. It’s not that, either. Although you know that would be a good one to put out there, because it would make it a lot easier for you to understand ascension. Are you wanting to get beamed up? Do you plan on getting beamed up? Nay.

Ascension is a two-fold process. There is the ascension within the physical vehicle which is a function of your thoughts, your beliefs, your love, your life, functioning at the very highest possible level. When you are at that place in which you are recognizing consciously living love, when you realize that while you are functioning at your very best, and it only gets better, then it could be said that you are functioning in the physical realm’s form of ascension. Spiritual ascension however, is much more like merger than it is disembodiment. Ascension involves choice to a certain extent. Even if ascension was just a little bit later on tonight—and it is not, darn—not all of you would go. And it’s not because you’re not worthy, it’s not because you ate sugar today, it’s not because you complained once too often. It’s because there are a whole lot in this world who aren’t in the function of ascension, and you’ve chosen to stay until they are. And you’ll stay until you’re 157 years old. [Laughter] The new fifty. Oh! Is it thirty is the new forty or is it the other way around? Forty is the new thirty? Thirty is the new forty makes sense to me, but . . .

Sanat, it’s not funny. He says it’s not true.

S: It is true. He says he’s a hundred and fifty-seven already.

Ascension of your spiritual self is a function of merger without death. No greasy spots and no worried families. But ascension beyond the physical and the spiritual as it is here is a part of the completion of Sacred Status and that is the ascension itself of the spirit of the planet itself as it moves to another level altogether. I’m using that visual, but I don’t mean it to imply that ascension means the planet is going to go up like a helium balloon. You know, you get sort of specific now and again.

[referring to the items on the foot rest] What is all of this? Such a collection here.

No greasy spot, physically speaking, you will become aware of those moments; spiritually speaking, it is a function of pure merge. No grabbing ankles, not tying another down. Did you toss that? [Interaction with DT over cards]

“At this year’s retreat, you asked us during the ceremony to direct our group’s energy to healing the seeds of dragon energy in the North Americas. Did this have the effect of full healing?”

S: No.

“And why did the dragon seeds need to be healed?”

S: Because they were in North America. [Laughter]

“What can damage such a seed and what frequency is required to heal it? Were any of the dragons we awakened so far from seeds that were damaged?”

S: Have you numbered how many questions are in that one? So far I’ve said, “No, because North America,” because North America because you are a society of . . . umm . . . outward-driven. Better example altogether, all right? I’m moving way into the airy-fairy for this. No, not airy-fairy; into the storybooks for this, all right? What is this about? [Samuel claps] “I believe . . .” Tinkerbelle. Why [claps] ? Frank, do you remember?

Tinkerbelle was sick because people didn’t believe in fairies anymore, and so she was losing her energy and getting weaker and weaker. In order for her to have strength, those who believed in fairies were asked to clap. People started clapping, and people believing in fairies and her energy brought her back.

S: Why clapping?

Because it was a stage play and the only way they could detect that the audience was saying, “I believe in fairies.”

S: So. You have killed off all the fairies, and no longer see God in the little things, only at things like football games.

And then only if we win.

S: Because you walk through your world and you do not see the sacred beauty and there are thirty different voices screaming inside their head saying either, “I do!” or saying, “Well, that’s not true.” And you’re right. In here, that’s not so true. But not so far as you might think, either. Dragon spirit is a label before it’s fully a thing. Dragon force is a recognition of life force energy with a special mission seeded into this world. How many of you have started a garden? If you were to prepare the soil and place the seeds and go away and never come back, would your seeds produce? Some would. Some would. A particular few particularly hardy ones, or the ones the birds spat on or something else, but for the most part you would not have a good return from what had been planted, because it needs care. So it’s a matter of recognizing something you cannot see or hear or even feel.

But what can you do to become more aware of it and perhaps even help it out? Well, let’s see, you could all become farmers. That was a joke—mind you, not a very good one obviously, but that was a joke. Well, one of the things that you could do is start looking for dragons, because it fills a part of you that’s looking for dragons! How many of you have looked into the sky and seen clouds that looked just like a dragon; or in bushes or trees, shapes that had dragon; or all of a sudden you see books that have dragons on them; or pictures here and there. They’re showing up everywhere! Better than the yellow Volkswagen of old, it’s the “dragons of new!” Your awareness tunes you, and that tuning flows out. There is nothing you can possibly think that is not going to have an effect on all that is around you. Everything you think, needless to say, and do spreads out like a rock in the pond: rippling effects. Dragon energy [while clapping], the life force of dragon energy in spite of a culture that is dedicated to the outside instead of the inside, in spite of a culture that thinks magic comes in animated films, that miracles are for someone else, that true love isn’t possible. In spite of that, you give hope to that which has been hidden. The more you need to see it and feel it and smell it and hear it, taste it—the more you need your senses involved in getting something—the more likely you are to misinterpret what you’re getting. Any scientist will tell you the proof is in the result. It’s not in how beautifully stated the theorem is. Darn! I can do that beautifully stated part pretty well. So live at the highest function life force can live and have the effect of keeping what has been a greatly forgotten, largely ignored, and deeply planted seed. You wish, there’s more, alive and waiting.

“In our culture, beliefs about money, self-worth, and work in the world, career and job, tend to be closely bound together.”

S: Ya think?!

“These are identity issues. When our fears come into play, it can be hard to know what we’re really fearing, and a fear in one area can block us in other areas of the belief complex. For instance the fear that we’re not worthy can affect our ability to be paid well for our work, or our fear of not having the money we need can lead us not to not make necessary changes in our work life. What common pitfalls do you see us encountering in these areas? What advice do you have for those who choose to work on these issues to bring balance into their lives?”

S: That’s lovely. That’s absolutely lovely. All right, we’re going to do this two ways. You listening out there, Mona? She’s sitting out there instead of in here, so I just want to make sure she can hear everything. I’m just being polite. What do you fear? Well, is there enough time to list all of this stuff?

Ultimately, not being enough.

S: Ultimately, the greatest fear is the fear of not being enough. Which really doesn’t sound like so much until you translate it into the words that you might use every day, and that might be, “I don’t deserve.” Or, “I am not/cannot/should not . . .” Think for a moment, if you will, about something that you have a fear about. Maybe that fear is that “I cannot get advancement in my career, because I do not have the education that is needed, but I cannot go back to college while I have a job because I’m afraid I will not be able to maintain my income, maintain my sanity, maintain my family, maintain my . . .” That’s a fear that you’re not enough to be able to make that work, to be able to handle what sort of needs to be done to get over the fear that is there. You with me? So far?

The fear that you are not enough is at the bottom, generally speaking, of any of the procrastinations, the blocks, the sabotages, the setbacks that come from yourself or someone around you. “Wait a minute, Samuel, what about this free-will thing where somebody else’s free will can get in my way and cause a big problem?” It’s a problem because of your fear. Somebody else running you over career-wise or family-wise can be something as simple as when a three-year-old says, “I’ll never do this again!” as opposed to a thirty-year-old saying, “I’ll never do this again!” If you don’t have the fear attached to it, then you’re not going to be so strongly invested that you cannot see any other choice. So how do you get rid of a fear like that? Well, one option, of course, is to just keep it, and stuff it sort of in the back of your heart, so anytime something starts going bad you and just pop it out. That is a rather odd idea, isn’t it? And by doing that, you’ll always have a good excuse for not—and you can just fill in the blank after that.

Another thing you can do is see how it serves you. “Samuel, did you get the question, did you hear it right? See how it serves me?” Yes. Because as I said—since this was a part of the interview—as I said in the earlier question, believe it or not, you are the one in charge of your life, and if that doesn’t mean you’re in charge of every hole you fall into, it does mean that you’re in charge of how that is going to affect your world. You control you. Or at least you’re getting better at it. More than that, no. In addition to that, the things that you have chosen to allow into your life are there because it pays you something to keep them there. There are those things that come into your life that are just there and gone. And there are those things that are like a needy puppy, following you around no matter where you go, peeing on the floor of your life. What do you do then? Because surely that doesn’t serve you. Yes, it does. It serves you by showing you, if you will look, where there is a belief that absolutely doesn’t need to be a part of your life anymore because it’s making you miserable and crazy. Suzie’s here to tell you that.

If you are unhappy with what’s going on in your life, please, please, do these three things. The first one is, do not need to experience it alone. If you do not have people who love you that you can be a sounding board to, I know that there are people you can pay to do that with. Some of them are in this room. It occurs to me that there’s a lot of things you can pay for in this society, isn’t there? And it’s especially helpful if that friend or doctor is going to remind you of what’s positive in your life. Because that’s the second part. The first one is surround yourself with people who love you that you can talk to. Or people that you can pay to talk to, and maybe the love will come later, who knows?

The second part of that: positive function equals gratitude and higher awareness. Your choosing to move beyond is the positive function. “I don’t need this in my life anymore. I don’t want this in my life anymore.” Awareness: ninety-five percent of the issue. Got that awareness going, it’s easy from there. It’s old but it’s true even so, as true ten thousand years ago as it is now. Gratitude changes you. Gratitude changes a situation. Gratitude is a force of great power. And I highly recommend that when you have found that group of loving people that you can talk to that they direct you to a positive frame of mind, that they direct you toward constantly looking for ways to be grateful.

And the third thing is, if you have created a vacuum you need to fill it with something. You recognize that there is something you want to get rid of in your life, you need to have something to put in there, or you’re going to do yourself a disservice. “I’m going to stop eating . . .” Tell me something.

Chocolates.

S: Chocolates! Or vegetables. And if you do not have something to put into its place you’re going to feel deprived. And when you’re deprived you’re going to become depraved, desperate. You’re working to pathetic.

[…]

S: Yes, that’s true as well. Unless you’re making a reference to your seatmates here. Deprivation puts you into security mode, and security mode brings up your fears. So you cannot do that. You must replace it right away. Know what it is when you’re going into it. “I have this fear about —, and I know that this is an action I need to take.” Because you’ve been talking this out, and you’re going to let something go, know what action is going to replace it. More.

[DT tosses card] It’s harder than it looks, isn’t it?

DT: I have a lot more respect for people who have sat here before me. [Audience laughter]

S: But you’re fortunate; at least you can still read. Sometimes that’s not so easy.

“How can we use the powerful creation energy that’s pouring in this year to potentize our efforts to manifest the means we need to do the work? Specifically, how can we focus that energy to attract financial prosperity and create an abundant flow of the personal circumstances that are best to support our work, even though we don’t know for sure what those best circumstances would be?”

S: It’s a great question. All right. You can put an ad into the newspaper, you can go to singles bars, you can . . . now, why are you laughing? Are you thinking that maybe I misunderstood the question? And where I’m going with it is [to say that] the very same sorts of manifestation activities [that work] for anything work for bringing more work or more finances into your life. It’s the same thing. Now, I’m interested to see what that personal ad might look like when you’re trying to increase your income, but if you’re looking for work, that could be a way. “Looking for . . .” What is looking for Mr. Goodbar? Is it a person who will pay?

Sugar-daddy.

S: It’s in there, too, but isn’t it some sort of candy? And don’t you think it’s interesting that that’s all associated with food? Point being that such an ad would probably be asking for somebody that is wanting to—oh, what would be a nice way to say it—support, payroll. “Looking for payroller. Looking for bankroller.” “I have come to this planet to help you get rid of the great sin of the love of money. I can help you by taking it off your hands and out of your consciousness.”

All right, what you do is you network. What does that mean? You talk to people. You figure out what it is that you want, you figure out who the market is, or what the market is, for what it is you want and you look from there to see where what you do in your life intersects those who are involved in what you want to do. You work it like a job. You don’t just put out, “All right, Universe, I need an income of forty thousand dollars a month.” You then sit back and twiddle on your thumbs, and the Universe says, “Sure, all right, but I’ve got to warn you it’s going to take two million years for it to all get together.” By that time, it won’t matter.

What do you want, what do you need to do to make it work, to bring it to you? What are you not doing now that you could be doing to take you that step farther? Is it that you do not have the money or is it that you are receiving money but it’s going right back out? Take a look at that. What is it you don’t need to be spending your money on that you are right now? What could you do to take on other work, to invest in that education that will take you a step farther? Don’t treat it like it is so much harder than creating a parking place. It’s all the same activity. All the same. You must know what you want. You must know why you do not have it now. You must know what you need to do to change that. You must be willing to do it. And then you do it. And most fall at the “must be willing to do it.” The power of creation is not about giving you ten thousand dollars in the next two months. The power of creation is about making you what you are here to be. Be careful with it. It’s a lot bigger than you.

[To DT, flipping a card] That was even better.

“At the recent retreat, you said that you were surprised that so many Guardians were still tolerating alcohol as much as they were. Please explain what you meant by that and whether you were speaking of it as a physical or as a spiritual issue.”

S: No, I meant it as a physical issue. [Clothing issues and references] Let’s go back to that again. What was the question?

Alcohol.

S: Alcohol! Yes. Got it. Generally speaking, the more aware you become of what feels good, then the more aware you also become of what also become of what doesn’t feel good. Even though alcohol or highly spiced foods or there’s so many things—over-sweet, over-dairy, over—are all a very typical part of life, you may not be aware at all of how it’s affecting you until you’re off for a while. See how you are without its effects and then bring it back in consciously. Some people don’t have to do that letting go of it before they realize it. Some people are just aware enough. Frank, you quit eating wheat. Why?

It made me hurt.

S: His belly hurt. Sort of like, what did you say? It hurt like a gall bladder attack. “Oh, maybe it’s the wheat,” as opposed to “Not anything I’m doing. I’ll just take some more of that medicine to make it stop hurting,” which is typical. You go out one night and you are the designated driver and you notice that drunk people aren’t very funny, no matter how much they’re laughing, no matter how funny they think they are. And it clicks. “I don’t want to be one of those people,” so you stop drinking. As you become more aware of you, you become more aware of what keeps you feeling good and what keeps you from feeling good. And that’s my point. It surprises me how easy it is to ignore all of that. I encourage you to try. And Stuart’s not dancing up and down or anything yet.

“Why did this particular retreat knock the stuffing out of so many people? It mentally, emotionally, and physically knocked me to the floor and left me and many others asking the same question, ‘Was the retreat so hard on you, too?’ I don’t think that’s meant . . .”

S: I don’t think that they’re asking me the question asked amongst yourselves: “Was the retreat hard on you?” Yes, no, yes? Yes and no. There’s a lot of answers that fit in here.

This was a hard retreat. In the friendliest package I could, I hit you with both barrels. Purposefully. In the friendliest package that Mary Claire and I could, from the beginning, the point was very much keeping you from holing up in your room and not being very involved and not particularly finding out about others and their lives and what’s going on. It’s hard to imagine, isn’t it, that people who are here on this earth to love like to hide out? But there you go. And then in the meetings, it was very much about, “Look at this, think about this, look at this. What works for you, what does not work for you?” It was all about getting to know you. And the fact of it is, for some of you that’s an unpleasant process, because when you really let yourself get to know you, you get to know your fears, the unsightly blemishes that no cream will cover, because they rupture out of the soul. All right, maybe not the soul. They are about self-judgment and plain judgment and comparative judgment. They are about forgiving oneself but not forgetting why it is you needed that forgiveness lest you go back there again.

It was a hard retreat, and there was laughter and there was friendship and there was drums. It’s always a crowd-pleaser. There was beauty and joy and friends made and renewed. And there were expectations unmet, hopes dashed, wants unfulfilled. And you know, that’s life. The retreat isn’t a magical escape from life, because you bring with it the fears and the beliefs and the difficulties that make it painful or hard; or drop the fears. What you get is the opportunity to be in a place where you are so loved, where you are surrounded by people who want to love you if you’ll let them in. I will tell you a few small secrets. Everybody in this room is over-booked, [to the dog] including you. Is that what you are saying? “Do you have cookies,? Are any of those cookies?” Go. You see, he’s all right.

Over-burdened physically, mentally, emotionally, even spiritually. Oh, sure, also light-hearted, filled with love, grateful for every day, but not having the magical life dumped on their lap. Everyone in here works it, even the dog.

The form is on some new medication, it’s a very interesting thing. I like watching what it’s doing. But one of the things that it’s doing is that she’s waking up happy. [to audience member] Get that stuff! Because your place would have a lot of it. It’s for chemo, yes.

And what you want to do when you wake up happy is remember it. Write it down, in Sensurround. Put a little bow on your wrist that reminds you, “I had this moment of happiness. This is my minute of bliss. This is my hour of bliss.” Be aware of it. Pay attention so that when it looks like it might be coming your way again, you can reach out and grab it because you know what it is you’re looking for.

There’s a lot in life that’s hard. It’s not, it’s not that you fall on your face and mess it up. It’s not that you missed your ship that was going to come in. It’s not the job, the parents, the lover, the children. It’s not the person who looked at you oddly at the grocery. It’s not the stalker you have to—what is it you get to ward off the stalker?—a restraining order; thank you. It’s not those things that make your life good or bad, that make something hard or easy. It’s not those things. What is it? It’s how you choose to deal with those things. And you deal with those things one moment at a time. I believe you could say it with me. One by one by one, shifts to one with one with . . . one. You change this world, but you can only change this world by changing yourself first. And you can only change yourself with love.

Mary Claire, what is the name of your book? Becoming What You Want to See in the World. Becoming what you are. That’s what tonight’s questions have been.

[To DT] And you’ve done a nice job. Excellent.

Just this. Is this a month in which you celebrate mothers and motherhood? Yes? And how many of you in here are mothers? And how many of you had a mother? Those of you who are mothers, I have a question. Did you find you appreciated your mother a whole lot more when you became a mother?

Still going on.

S: Remember that in the biggest sense of the word, the nurturing, all-encompassing, loving being that a mother is all about is a part of you even if you’re not female, married, have children. You are very much a mother. You are a vehicle by which creation of something new and wonderful can flow into this world. You create miracles by living, breathing, doing. Create miracles of love. And remember to celebrate your own motherhood as well as gratitude to the one who gave you this chance.

Glochanumora. Happy trails.