October 4, 2009
Samuel: Hello dears. What have you done today to make somebody’s life better and brighter? Key words: today, you, what have you done to make somebody else’s life better and brighter? Aye.
Well, today I returned a tool that Steve Smith lent to me and it was his tool that I was hoping he was glad to get back. And although we would all agree that he has a lot of genuine love and hopefulness and trust for the world around him, I think it still encouraged him and made him feel better and brightened up his day to have that reinforced by having it […]
It works great.
. . . without breaking it.
S: What is that?
It’s called a “gator grip” and it has a lot of little pins so it will grip heads of different sizes and unscrew them or tighten them in either direction. It’s called a socket wrench.
As seen on TV.
And it works.
And it’s a valuable item in this world.
S: Lovely, very good. Well, better and brighter, better and brighter, and me too, I’m sure. Ah, you’ve all been slackers today have you?
Good, let’s have Sallie and then let’s have Suzanne.
This afternoon Colleen came into town by plane and I met her at the airport, took her home with me.
S: And your return makes for a lot of better and brighter, welcome home.
Thank you. It’s great to be here.
S: Nice work.
I planted a tomato plant way too late for this year but the tomatoes are starting to get ripe. But Michael can’t really see the difference, because he has an interesting kind of color blindness, can’t see if they’re getting ripe or not. So I was able to kind of find, they’re kind of buried in all this crazy stuff that’s the garden. I was able to pick nine of them today, and they’re kind of gourmet kind of cherry tomatoes, and so he’s definitely happy and said they taste great.
S: Better, brighter and tastier, yes, a very important part of it. Anyone else, yes?
I brought some tokens from Egypt back to a few people that I thought, when I saw them, had significance for those people and there was a connection in some way. And I think the three people that I brought something back for, I think it made their day better and brighter.
S: Lovely, lovely, aye.
I made extra oatmeal so my roommate could have some.
S: That always helps, doesn’t it, aye. But you’ve got to call it the right name.
What oatmeal? Porridge, sorry. I’m so sorry.
S: Porridge, it’s porridge.
If, now, some of you are already going to be up on this one, but don’t tell. If you could be anywhere, anywhere, where would you be? Where would you go? And just think about that. Think about the answer in there and then think about why, why. What is it about that place? What is it about the experience? What is it that draws you there? What does it give you? Because your answer is telling you what you need right now, telling you what you need to give you right now. So, one more question; what is it telling you?
Well now, you see, Frank, he knows that he really needs to be up here with me. Well, you see Frank . . .
That was a hint.
Would you like me to leave them loose?
S: I think at this point Owen is still a bit young to be overcome by giant poodle.
I forgot Owen was here.
S: That’s because he’s been amazingly quiet. Has it been so long he’s forgotten everybody and gotten shy?
He is a little shy but I don’t think he’s forgotten everyone.
S: All right, just making sure there, having missed you. And here comes Frank saying, “grrrrrr.” There you go, that’s what you needed isn’t it? There. Now, you know what the rules are, yes? And the rules are, go check out all of your friends.
He sniffed the crystals.
S: Of course he did. Live things know live things, all right. Now, what I’m doing here is readjusting him, but you know, actually it is something you can do. How many of you have pets? Now, of all of you who have raised your hands, how many of you have pets that are “family” that you just really relate to? All right, you want more of it do you?
Your hands are remarkable gateways for energy, and you find that out a lot of different ways. For instance; you roll them around a bit and you feel them heat up even though your fingers stay cold and your wrists are still cold, but right there in the center of your hands warms right up. And I forgot; have you seen this from those who have returned? Can you see it all? It’s almost gone. Anybody got any real red stuff left? Mary Claire is somewhat red there. We were doing some unity work with those portals. But nonetheless . . .
With your dominant hand, whatever hand it happens to be, put your hand over the heart, the dogs, the cats, the birds, over the heart. The non-dominant hand, put that at the top of the head or at the base of the skull, either one of those works, top of the head, base of the skull. And what you want to imagine is that there is light. “Samiel, golden light, white light, purple light?” Light going from hand to hand, hand to hand, head, heart, hand to hand. Now, if while you are doing that, you are thinking positive images, do not be very surprised if old Ollie or your cat or your dog does not either get rather startled—“They’re learning our language. We’d better be quiet”—or send you a few right back.
But that’s the system. Got that? Now, fact of it is, you can use that on people too, but you’ll find it works a lot better on dogs.
When we were last together I said that I was going to talk a little bit about how to deal with relationships of any kind in which somebody’s a little hard to deal with. Do you remember that? I still intend to do that. But before I do that I want to put a little Egypt into this discussion tonight. The first thing that I want to say—and I am hoping that the rest of the crew are watching on the streaming version tonight—but the first thing I want to say is you’ve done great work. And I’m not only speaking to those who went to Egypt, but I’m also speaking to those who stayed here and supported energetically the work that was being done. It’s probably the most mixed trip that I’ve had the pleasure of leading for you. And what I mean by that is, dragon was ready, wanted up, beating on the boat, really. It was a remarkably done ritual, probably the longest, hardest and most powerful that you’ve done to date, and it flowed beautifully. But all of the unity work that is required to make that happen had to happen in one week, because the main group trip was only one week long. Now, those who were in the pre-trip, they sort of had a head start on it; but even so, that was a very small group. It was a little worrisome at first and turned into a remarkable, beautiful function of unity, so much so that the crew on the boat took note. And I am truly proud of you, for on every trip you pretty much blew away any guide, any hotel operator, the whole crew. It’s sort of like Kay when the whole bunch gets together at a retreat and the park says, “Wow, what great people,” like that.
And one of the things that happened, which was very, very lovely, but it got a truly remarkable discussion going on the boat that I’m wanting to get going again here so that it is recorded and able to be accessed by others, was a discussion that came up because Mark, from Pittsburgh, had made a friend on the boat who was very excited about the work and the website, and other people on the boat were very excited about it and they saw, in case you ever think it can go unnoticed, they saw what they had never seen, as they said: the kind of love and joy and respect and kindness that they’ve never seen from another group. They wanted to know, once they got a sense of what the teachings were, ”How do you keep it going? What can we do to keep it going?” And I gave a few suggestions, but then I asked the group, “What would you say to them? What can they do to keep this alive?”
Now, for those of you, who were there and can remember what you said or what others said, please chime in with that. And for those of you who were not there but you have a piece of advice or two that could be good in that kind of situation, please chime in with that. So please, tell me, what would you say to somebody who wanted to know what can they do?
In starting anything, you focus on it, and it is in your mind a lot, and you perfect it in your thoughts and by constantly reminding yourself. At first it is not that natural, but pretty soon it becomes a part of you. It is what you’re getting and it’s feeding you, but you’ve made it a part of yourself. But it takes effort, I think.
S: Do it. Do it, and do it until it becomes a piece of you. That’s good, Steven,
I would tell them to remember that their thoughts are very powerful.
S: Yes, yes.
And because they are, to focus on what’s positive, and focus on what is instead of what isn’t. And as they do that they’re going to develop an attitude of gratitude, because they’re going to be focusing on what they’re grateful for. And that’s positive.
S: And on what’s working and the successes, yes, yes. And it’s contagious, yes. Excellent, excellent. Aye.
Before taking action, to consider what’s the most loving thing to do.
S: Yes, always, what’s the most loving thing I can do, here. Excellent, aye.
And to have a “we” attitude rather than a “me” attitude. Think of what’s best for the entire group and put that foremost in your thinking.
S: That’s right. That’s good.
This is for the people who were on the boat that weren’t a part of the group? Is that what you’re saying? What could they do to keep it going?
S: Yes.
I think if they were very new to the information and to the whole concept of this, they might remember the people that they saw and talked to and the qualities in those people that they found so desirable, to try to incorporate those into their own life in their own way, to copy what they saw.
S: Yes. Allow yourself an invisible mentor. That’s good, that’s good.
It takes a little bit of what Bonnie said. First of all, you’ve often had us, when we do, we imagine it or visualize something that was happy or a time in our life that was important, when we felt happy and good. You can take that, and like Bonnie said, you can remember the people to make it powerful for you, remember that even because you observed it, they can only recognize it because it’s in them. They are a part of the creation of that. And remember that power and put it into your life. They helped create, too, because they were a part of it.
S: Lovely, very lovely.
If they wake up every day with the intent of having love be, having a love-filled day and that they remember that intent throughout the day, it would help.
S: Good, good.
Have a long, on-going conversation with the Universe.
S: Yes, yes, just nonstop, keep it going. It’s real because you make it so, more.
To see the highest and best of all situations.
S: Yes, yes, and too, as you see it, that’s the mastery in it, but until you’re at the point that you can see it, assume the best. Don’t be stupid, mind you, but assume the best. It makes a big difference, aye.
Well, what we found as a group, over and over again, is the power of a smile, because we were in a culture in Egypt where we couldn’t communicate very easily with local people. They often spoke a lot more English than we spoke Arabic . . .
S: Very often, actually.
. . . the power of a smile to brighten someone else’s day and to be kind of an ice breaker. It has a ripple effect.
S: Yes it does, aye.
I was actually going to say smile a lot, but also, find reasons to smile a lot; search them out and embrace them.
S: Well said, good.
When you’re relating with someone, to really be present with that person and really focus on the interaction and that person and what’s being said and understood . . .
S: Yes.
. . . so that it’s created and it’s made to be a real and loving moment.
S: And to add to that, look into their eyes. It’s amazing to me how rarely that happens in this world, at least in cultures outside of you right here. Look into their eyes, smile, be present, pay attention, make mental notes, absolutely. But you had a hand up; it is up, all right.
To remember that we’re Spirit trying to live in form and not the other way around . . .
S: Good.
. . . and that because of that, we are limited by form. We will make mistakes and to pick ourselves back up again and keep going.
S: Good. What’s the power of making a mistake?
Redemption, learning, teaching.
S: Redemption, learning, teaching moment, say it again, Lisa.
You get the opportunity to correct it and that’s a good modeling.
S: Absolutely, absolutely, and you’re putting into the grid that mistakes happen. It’s not about the mistake; it’s about getting back up and continuing on. That is the poser: not getting caught in it, not making that your life, continuing. Stuart.
I was going to basically say what Mary Claire said, but say in addition to that is to try to always do the best you can, where you are with what you have. Then when you do fall, you fall knowing that you did the best that you could with what you had at the moment and you pick yourself back up and you learn from it. And hopefully next time you will be able to maybe not fall. Maybe it will just be a little stumble and you won’t have to pick yourself all the way back up. And the next time maybe it won’t even be a stumble. You don’t beat yourself up when you do fall because, as Mary Claire said, your Spirit, which is perfection having a human experience, and as a human you are going to make mistakes. Regardless of how pure your intent is going to be there are going to be times when it doesn’t work out or . . .
S: Hate that part.
. . . because of someone else’s free will, it doesn’t go as planned. And you can spend a lot of time beating yourself up because it doesn’t work out or blaming the Universe or the other person or whatever. But it’s much easier to say, “Okay, we did the best we could or I did the best we could” and move on and learn it and chalk it up as a growing experience.
S: And if you’re not making mistakes it means you’re not trying. Yes.
If you have found yourself having an emotional reaction, look within yourself and ask what the belief is that is bringing about the reaction, and ask yourself with each answer if that’s […] keep going back until you get the actual reason you’re having that reaction, what the belief is.
S: Can you sample that a little more? Can you . . .
If I am sitting comfortably in a room like this and am asked to bring the dog up forward and I get frustrated with it, ask myself . . .
S: Hmmm.
. . . what that belief is that’s causing me to have a reaction. And it may be that I don’t want to have to, so I have a belief that I should be able to enjoy the meeting without having to worry about the dogs and I should be able to enjoy the meeting without any interference. And then I’d realize what the deepest belief is, and it may be that my belief is that I’m afraid the dogs are going to react or whatever. But just keep going back until I find the reason. What is the belief that’s there? That was a poor example because it was just a little frustration because I was going to have to move and it wasn’t an emotional reaction. So I can’t get back to a real belief that may be a belief that I’m not going to be able to handle the dogs, I’m not good enough with the dogs, I’m not good enough with most of the things. And it usually will get back to I’m not good enough at something.
S: And ultimately, an uncomfortable, emotional response is the result of fear, afraid he’s not going to be able to manage whatever comes in front of him. And that can ruin not only your day but your life. That’s a tough one.
Let go of expectations and accept people where they’re at.
S: Good, good, like that one.
I was going to say not to take life too seriously, but it’s actually to find the balance between taking life seriously and lightly.
S: And maybe the key word there is balance, balance, aye.
I would suggest that they starve expectations, entitlement and assumptions and instead nourish adaptability and flexibility, so that they can be what is needed at the moment instead of the moment needing to be what they think they need.
S: Big, very good, big, Cam.
Kind of tagging onto David’s: look for opportunities to experience and share laughter.
S: Lovely, lovely. I think that the things that you are offering to those gentlemen in Egypt or to each other right here are the kind of reminders that make life good no matter what you’re doing, no matter where you are.
One of the things I did not hear, but that really is needed to pull it all together, is to have a vision of what you want your life to be like, because without the vision you’re just treading water. What is it you want for yourself? And it’s not, “I want this car and this suit and this house.” It’s what do you want to be as a person? How do you want to be remembered? How do you want to touch your world? And part of that vision needs to be that it’s about living love at your best. And with that a part of your vision, and you reminding yourself that every day, you’ll not only be able to keep what has started, you’re going to be able to find your path and live your destiny, and that’s big, really, really big. Thank you for that. Thank you.
Now, sometimes even when you are doing your best and you are being as happy as you can and you’re following all of the rules of good relationships and communication, sometimes you find that you’ve got just this cranky, vindictive, angry, unhappy—I don’t know, all of the different negative things that can show up in a relationship that you’ve got to work with every day, or that you have as a friend that you don’t enjoy being around quite so much because they’re not happy and they’re whatever the list happens to be. Do you have in your life individuals that you’ve got a relationship with them? It does not mean it’s an intimate relationship. It does not mean that it’s even a very personal relationship. But you’ve got a relationship with them. They’re checking out your groceries here, and they’re maybe surly or maybe they sabotage you or maybe they look down at you in one way or another, but it’s a relationship that isn’t happy. Do you have, or have you ever had, one of those in your life? And if your answer is yes, I want to talk about a pretty effective way to change the situation. And the answer here about changing that situation isn’t you just live love the best you can where you are with what you have and if they get it, it will be happy ever after, because sometimes you can do that and it just doesn’t work that way. Of course, what are you supposed to do when you’ve done your best and it just doesn’t work?
Turn the other cheek.
S: Turn the other cheek. That means you’ve got four times, right? Try again. I thought that maybe what you were supposed to do was get angry and bite back, or give it right back to them, or crumble into a little ball of tears and upset and tell yourself you’re never going to get yourself in this situation again until next time.
I’m realizing more and more that I have so much more here to do than to think about any one relationship that’s that powerful in my life and so I’m learning to just let go and say, “This isn’t working.” And walk away.
S: Good for you, good for you. That’s hard. That’s the master’s version of it. It’s not always easy to be able to detach in that way. Although it does not have to be walk away forever if it’s somebody you’ve got to see every day. It can be a detachment for the moment.
What does detachment mean? What does it not mean?
Not caring.
S: It doesn’t mean you don’t care. What does it mean?
It doesn’t have a negative charge to it.
S: It should not have a negative charge to it.
And you don’t let it run you.
S: And it should not run you.
Not attached to the outcome.
S: Not needing to have it your way. That’s what detached is about: allowing it to be.
And not needing to change them.
S: And not needing to change them in order for you to be able to function.
It’s letting go of attachment.
S: It’s the letting go of attachment. Well, the difficulty in letting go of attachment is you don’t know you’re attached until something comes up and smacks you in the face and the hurt of it, the pain of it says, “Whoa, something here I need to do with this.” So you’ve had a smack in the face and you are ready for changing the situation so that you’re not going to get smacked in the face again, and, very quickly, very easily, there are a few steps that can help you move through it. And the first one is to ask yourself, “What just happened here?” Ask yourself; don’t say it out loud. Don’t ask that person, “What just happened here?” If you are able to take the time to actually journal it a bit, you might get even more information out of it than you thought, but try to immediately, in the situation, make it as small a statement as possible. “I was sitting on the far side of the room. He called the dog up. That meant I had to move everything, come up here, and it was hard.” What happened; an unemotional-as-possible look at the actual facts of, “This is what went on.” It’s not easy to do. You might benefit from somebody else giving an unemotional look at what you just wrote or what you’re thinking, what you say to them, so that they can say, “Wait, that’s still emotional involvement. Back it off more, just the facts. That’s still anger in there. What just happened?” Only the facts.
Stage two: “What could I have done differently?” Now, I want to tell you something very important here. You always could have done something differently. If you find that your first response is, “I wouldn’t have done anything differently,” you’re the problem, because when you are flexible and you are working with another, and all of the things that we said a little bit earlier are the things that are going on in your life, then you are always going to see options for your own behavior.
“What could I have done differently? Well, maybe if I had chosen a different time to bring this up, perhaps if . . . What could I have done differently?” And you want to look for options there. Now, here is where you are going to put yourself into the other person’s shoe. It’s not “What could they have done differently.” It’s “What would he/she say went on?” When you are able to again, unemotionally, look from their view, you’re going to be able to act in a much more powerful function. “What happened? What could I have done differently?” In this person’s view, what happened?
Next one: “Can I change the situation, the past, the future or the now, to change this?” “Can I?” is different than “Will I?” If you are willing, do so. If you are not willing, ask yourself why. Some of the reasons why you may not be willing can be because you are the heart of the problem. Or it can be because you have tried everything you know how to and you have turned every one of those other cheeks and it never gets better. Or it may be because it’s a personality clash—it’s a chemical problem—and that happens, doesn’t it? There are people on this planet whose best bet is not to try to be best friends forever, but to just function cordially. Can you do that? Can you—here comes that word again—can you detach enough to be kind, civil, if not close and chummy? It could be that the other person has problems you know nothing about that cause behaviors that you are effected by. It could be that the person has personal issues with your personality and there is something you can do about that. What can you do about that?
Avoid that person.
S: And as a for-instance, something that a lot of you get hit up with: “Why are you so happy all the time? Why are you so positive? It’s just not normal.” What do you say to that?
I don’t know anything proactive like that, but I would say that if they have a problem with my personality, that I could be kind enough to spare them a little bit my personality. That is, in any given situation you can turn the volume a little up and down . . .
S: Exactly, exactly, and that is a loving thing to do. You know that somebody does not manage the first thing in the morning, bright and perky. Will you bring them another cup of coffee and keep your own self a bit quiet until you know that they are a little more entrenched into the day? Perhaps you turn your volume down physically speaking. You’re not so busy, you’re not so hyper, intense—any of those work, depending on the situation. A lot of you, when you are stressed, tend to get fidgety: Stuart [drumming with hands]. You’ve got a version of that too. In a meeting just recently, I just waited for a few minutes for the pen to stop clicking as somebody was releasing their stress. There may be things you can do to put your own bright, beautiful, deserves-to-be-there first self aside and let the other person have a bit of a break there. It is rare that you cannot touch spiritually—emotionally speaking—that you cannot touch another heart by your consistent thoughtfulness and kindness. But there will be those in your life that you cannot touch. And when you are dealing with people like that, bottom line is: first thing you want to look at is yourself. “Am I the problem?” because you might be. And the second thing you want to look at is, “What can I do to make it easier?”—easier for the other person. That’s where you’re looking at the personality issues, the what’s-going-on-in-their-life. Maybe there’s something happening there. “What can I do to make it easier for them?” and for yourself. What can you do to make it easier for yourself? That sounds really—I hope it sounds really simple. More than that, I hope you never really have to deal in a situation that causes you to have to ask yourself those questions. “What went on here?”
Everything in this world happens through relationships. What you are here to do in this world happens through relationships, and in every relationship, everything comes about because of communication. Making friends, bringing about family out of those friends, touching lives, being a mentor and dealing with relationships that aren’t going well for whatever reason, is your day-to-day experience. There are some people that only the psychologists in here can ever help, but most of your relationships never need to reach a point that you’ve got to feel you must back off, run away, hide. Look at yourself. Look to see how you can help, and do it. Right now in your life, more than ever before, you have people showing up, speaking up, telling you their life story, talking about whatever’s going on with them in the moment while you’re just trying to wash your hands and get out of the bathroom. More than ever, you have an opportunity to touch other lives by an example of right action and to touch your own life by allowing into it those who you can share the joy with, that you can make a friend instead of just a co-worker. It’s an effort, but since everything in your life is about relationships and everything about relationships is about communication, it’s worth the effort.
Next month is questions and answers. Can I have my Sources up here?
In […]?
S: No dear, you can come however it is you wish.
So be thinking about what it is you want to ask and there will be three-by-five, four-by-six—however it is it works—those little cards on the seats so that you can write them down when you get here. So be ready. It will be fun.
November, as you know, is the start of a new year after the most important Samhain of the world, any of them, all of them. It’s a month of magic. Look for it and a time of transformation. Be ready for it.
Glochanumora.
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