October 7, 2007

Samuel: Well greetings dears.

Hello, Samuel.

S: How are you?


S: Do you feel like highly empowered, love-filled, joy-filled beings of love?

I think DC gave the best answer. Say it again.

That too, yep.

It’s in there.

S: You see, that’s very realistic, because in your life, so much of the time you know that here you are, this spiritual warrior in the world. Here you are, this being of love and magnificence and power and joy. But along with that is the one that’s just really tired of the routine, that’s really frustrated about the cost of bread. And the trick is remembering that part of what you are is very aware of that magnificent being of love, of light, that you are. If you make a habit of that instead of looking at just how frustrating things are, then you’re going to get to see how much more frustrating things can be, because that will seem to be what you are looking for. If you allow yourself to remember that this is how things are at this moment, but your greatest reality is—and whatever you want to say your greatest reality is—you’re going to be drawing to you much more balance, because that is indeed balanced. And do you think that balance is a good thing in this world? Now you laugh, but how would you know this? Was that an ouch?


S: You think? Life is full these days. And the very nature of this year allows that life is going to continue being very full. And there is no more important a time than now. Well, actually that’s a good statement right there all by itself: there is no more important a time than now. But to go with where I was going with it, to have your life balanced. Life doesn’t end, even though you might. And life tends to be made up of your memory of the experiences you have accomplished, you have gone through, you have worked through—good, bad, joyous, sad. This could be a rap, right, or a Broadway musical with Suzie’s.

Yes, start writing immediately.

S: You get what you ask for. Now, you get a whole lot of things, and some of them you look at and say, “I would never have asked for that. I did not ask for that. Oh no, not that one.” But I want you to remember what I said just a little bit earlier: that what you focus on most of the time looks like what you are the most interested in. And when you are a being that easily creates or co-creates—to say better: that easily co-creates your now, hopefully consciously co-creating that now—then you are going to regularly have the opportunity to bring into your life whatever it is that you’re putting the most focus to. And that’s a warning and that’s a promise. And yes, the fact of it is, it’s very true, some of the energy that you are putting toward these things that you look around and say, “Wait a minute. That was not on my agenda. I did not put energy to this,” are those things that you have not thought about for so long that you’re not even aware, not conscious of putting out those thoughts. And that is why—and I’m not even getting to what we are talking about yet—that is why it is so important now, in this pivotal year, in every area of your life and every area of your world, it is so important that you work to be aware of what you need, of what you want, of surrounding yourself with positive examples of positive people to fill you up higher than the negative that you cannot necessarily run away from; for the things that are loaded with free will, and not only yours, and therefore not necessarily something that you can grab ahold of and direct exactly the way you want it to be.

Because free will means that there is interaction for change. That’s what free will is. Interacting with what is. what you always want to pay attention to, and change is what you always want never to be afraid of. Consciously interacting for the purpose of . . . and what is it you’re looking to bring into your life? What is it you’re looking to be proud of? How much of your day are you a living, thinking part of, and how much of it is a rote reaction? Live while you’re alive. Live consciously. Live happily. It’s a choice, not a symptom.

“Ah, I see you have laughed right twice today. That must mean you are happy.” No, it doesn’t work that way. It’s a choice. And remember, you really are magnificent. You really do make a difference. You bring change in everything you do. And because you are one of those on this Earth who consciously chooses “I want to live love,” you become not only the example for others, but the hope. And that’s so important.

In this life you experience many different lives, don’t you? Now, I’m not talking about some inter-dimensional bleed through. I’m not talking about any kind of “walk-in,” none of that. I would laugh too hard and not be able to keep the thought going if it was something like that. But who you were yesterday is not the same person you are today.

Thank God.

S: Yes, who you were last year. How about who you were, say, five years ago?

It really does seem like another lifetime.

S: It really does seem like another lifetime, that’s right. What are you doing with this life, the one you’re in right now at this moment, and is it the life that represents everything you would want your life to be speaking about to others in this world? My friend Paul . . . I was going to say is gone from you, but any of you who are any good at all at connecting into energy are probably aware that he is very much here, and will never be fully gone. And of course the Hallmark card version of that is, “As long as you have a memory of him,” but gosh, it’s sort of risky to relegate somebody to your memories, don’t you think? This life continues because Bonnie remembers, “Oh, no!”

We’re a new person every day.

S: So that you can start over all of those memories?

Because Bonnie can’t remember.

S: That’s the reason.

Poor Bonnie.

S: Not poor Bonnie at all, I could have pointed at any one of you in here and all of you would have related just as well, every one of you, even the very young, and there are a few of those. Mathew, how well do you remember these days?

Not so well, actually.

S: You see?

What was that remark about the very young?

S: I want to take a moment to take a few “Paul was a joy in my life. Here is a story.” And, Stuart, why don’t you start? This is not meant to be his memorial service, it’s meant to be an opportunity for those of you who may not have met Paul—although most of you knew him pretty well—and those of you who perhaps are not able to make it to the services his family might be having, to have the opportunity to put him in your life and give him another few days by putting him into your brain by way of somebody else’s memory. So, that really is a nice reason to have those lovely wakes where you get a little lubricated and the tongue gets a little soft and pliable and the stories start coming out . . . ”Well now, do you remember . . . ?” So, Stuart.

I have a lot of stories and memories of working back here with Paul. And over the years we’ve had so many anomalies with electrical equipment around your energy and around the energy of the group and we would always be perplexed when something would happen unexplainable, only to function perfectly a few moments later. One memory I have of Paul in a meeting was the very first time that he used the effects on the mixer, and you were saying, “And God said.” And then I don’t know what your words were but he turned up the reverb, so it sounded like you were in a big, you know, in heaven. And we all burst into laughter, and I thought that you were going to fall out of the chair. I’ve used that trick a time or two since, but he’s the one who first originated it.

S: Aye. Colleen, and then Mary Claire, and then Catherine..

This was earlier in my years in Phoenix. It was in the Pine Mountain Retreat in ‘92. I was roommates with Ken Tuggle and Paul. Now that’s quite a balance. I thought, Wow, I’m rooming with two men . . .

S: Did they pay extra for that?

I knew Ken in a different way.

S: Interesting story happening here, don’t you think?

I’m all ears.

It was a nice rustic cabin. Ken was a perfect gentleman.

Why is Ken sweating all the sudden?

It was a nice rustic cabin. I was a little bit nervous. I was a little bit, maybe even afraid of Paul. It was probably at a time in my life where I probably could have used his energy or the balance of the two, and maybe needed loosened up a little bit. Paul didn’t seem to mind that there was a female person in the cabin.

S: He had roomed with females before.

I was sort of hesitant at first because, you know, Paul’s very spirited but once I realized . . .

S: That was for the discussion that he was spirited, not the play on words there, but that he did everything he could to bring laughter and keep things light and light.

And loosen me up a bit. But once I realized he wouldn’t bite, I really enjoyed the story-telling and him sitting on my bed and just making me laugh. Because, like I said, I can think back to that time, which was a real another lifetime. It really does seem such a long time ago in many ways. But I really needed that.

S: Aye.

And he provided that, and I am so very grateful.

S: Aye.

And I would do that again, but not with Paul.

S: Mary Claire.

A lot of people remember Paul with, about his wit He was very witty, very funny, and a number of years ago he put out a comedy album. He was very . . . and he could do stand-up comedy. But he also had a very sweet side too. I think it was at the Pine Mountain Retreat, either that or it was in Scotland, I don’t remember which, the first Scotland trip. He walked up to me one day and he said, “I got this for you. I just had to get this for you.” It was a little, tiny hummingbird pin. He gave that to me. It touched me so because hummingbirds were real special to me. They had a significance that I could identify with that nobody else knew about. Paul didn’t know about it, but he said it just spoke to him. That was such a sweet side to him that he would see something that he thought connected with someone that he knew and he wanted to share that with them. I still have that pin and I always remember Paul.

S: Lovely, lovely. After there . . . I’m trying to follow the leaps that were made.

I think it was the first Guardianship Program, but it may not have been named Guardianship Program at that time.

S: That would be The Warrior Program.

Well, you had us signing in blood and . . .

Red ink, red ink.

Red ink, red ink, right.

It was drinking the blood.

That was another one.

It was red ink. But anyway, Paul was part of the program and he was living way out, like Ironworks Pike or Georgetown or something . . .

S: Ah, distant as well.

And you had made a big point about living up to your commitment to being here when we were having the meetings. And bless his heart, he did not have any transportation, and that guy walked. I think it took him three hours to walk from his home to get here on time for that meeting.


S: Aye. That’s powerful. Who else did I put into that row?

That was the last.

S: All right, well, then we have Lisa, yes, and is that Paula and Elizabeth and Sheryl, thank you love. I don’t see quite the way I used to . . . and Gwendolyn, all right.

I think the thing that strikes me most about Paul is that he was, like Mary Claire said, very witty. And he and Joy would play off of each other all of the time. They were both very irreverent and they could tell . . .

S: Still are.

And they could tell the most body jokes and just laugh and have a good time with themselves. But it was so infectious that it made you laugh, too, whether you were in on the joke or not.

Oh boy, what a party up there.

S: Herding cats. After Lisa was . . .

I know many people here know that Paul had some interesting challenges with his living arrangements, his jobs, his family. There were a lot of things; his life was very up and down. And one of the things that happened one time was that he lost his apartment. He couldn’t stay there and he had a boat that he was very fond of. And he needed some place to put that boat. He asked David and I if he could bring it out to the farm. And we said, “Yeah.”  He said it would be a month, maybe two at the most. We said, “Sure.” So he brought this thing out and left it parked in our back yard and three years later, the boat was still there The tires were flat and it was full of water and the birds had sat on it and nested in it and things like that. I went to Paul and I said, “Paul, you know, we need to get that boat moved.” And he said, “Yeah I know, I know.” And every so many months after that he’d come to me and say, “You know I haven’t forgotten. I’m doing my best to get that boat moved.” He didn’t have a lot of money. He couldn’t find somebody to help him move it, but he kept it in his mind and kept trying. And one day we came home and sure enough, the boat was gone. And I don’t know how he got it out of there because the tires were totally flat and I just don’t know how he did it. But that was Paul. No matter what the challenges were in his life, he tried to live up to what he had told you he would do and his commitments, like Cathy said.

S: Would that such powerful descriptions could be given for you as well. After Paula was Lillibeth.

You were talking about living many lives in this lifetime, and I met Paul when I was a freshman at the University Of Kentucky. And we were both hippies together. And he was an activist then and he had a lot of fun. And then I ran into him again.

S: There was a lot in that statement wasn’t there? For those who know him, that was a very power-packed statement.

I love it.

It is on tape, right? So, I knew him then, and then I ran into him again. I worked at Keeneland. I had a part-time job there and Paul also worked at Keeneland. And so we kind of ran into each other there. And it was then later that I ran into him again at Phoenix. It was just kind of like this thread that, you know a thread of a person in your life. And then one of my favorite memories of Paul was on the first Scotland trip. He, at that time, had a female roommate and he had some challenges . . .

S: Was it Colleen?

He was actually rooming with an old high school friend of mine and they had some challenges on that trip that were very demanding. And Paul was a superior friend.

S: Yes.

He was on a trip that was going to be something special for him and he stood by his friend and it was impressive. And he then later on went on to . . . I think we went on to Germany after that. They were supposed to go on to Germany. But Paul really put aside a lot of what his desires were and his needs and he was there for his friend. And that speaks volumes.

S: It does. Yes indeed it does, aye. After Lillibeth, must be Sheryl?

I remember Paul as one of the very first people that we met in Phoenix. And Paul has always been an anchor, is the best way I can describe it. We went on the very first Scotland trip. I was way back in 1989 and Paul was such a huge part of that trip. He was one of the first people that we actually had gotten to know well. And I was so touched by, as Lillibeth just said, his concern for his friend. And he was also very, very helpful to me, because I was having some issues on that trip as well. I remember we were walking along the beach in Lochranza and—this is my remembrance of it anyway— it was kind of funny because he said to me, he had had some problems with some addictions, alcohol. And he said, “One time I met with Samuel and I wanted to give him something that meant a lot to me. And I thought about it and the thing that meant the most to me in my whole life was a bottle of whisky and I gave it to Samuel.” I said, “Wwo!”

And I’ve never forgotten that. And there was that, what you would perceive as a dark side, but there was always an illumination to it. There was always a light around his dark side, and the fact that he could speak so freely and so effortlessly about it was such an example to me that we all have little things in our closet. But Paul would throw it wide open and show you what it was.

S: I’m going to add just a small amount to that story to continue showing that side. Paul had kept a bottle ever since he stopped drinking and that’s why it meant so much to him, because it was not opened. He also wanted to give me his little marker that says, “I have . . . something” . . . what is that?

Sobriety coin.

S: Sobriety coin, a coin, all right. But I really didn’t have need for either one. It truly is the thought, aye. That’s lovely, lovely.

Was Gwendolyn next?

At one point, as you all know, he sometimes had a place to live and sometimes didn’t have a place to live. And I had gotten this property outside of town and there was a little tenant house on it. And at this time Paul had no roof. So I said, “Why don’t you come out? You can live there. It will be difficult, because there’s no heat in this place in the winter time. “Oh it will be fine. It will be fine.” And he made it fine. There was a little mongrel dog that showed up, and he just loved that dog.

S: Yes indeed.

So he took that dog around with him. Now I never knew for sure, because I wasn’t living on the property then, how he got around. There was an old motorcycle, but what it did was lean against a pole and it didn’t go anywhere that I knew of. It was just an odd way about him. Another time I had a friend of mine from Delaware that was visiting and staying at the Hyatt. Well, he’s in there refinishing a piano. And he introduces himself to this friend and they get to chatting and talking, and we have a building. He’s just that kind of person. He knew you were a friend of his when he said hi, when he spoke to you. He was the real person all of the time. He was the real person all of the time. You never had any doubts about that, about him. You just knew it about Paul.

S: You will miss him. I won’t.

That was a na-na-na-na-na-na?

S: Yes, a na-na-na-na-na-na, Kay.

Paul and I go back a lot of years. We used to run the roads together back about fifteen or twenty years ago.

S: You used to do what?

Run the roads. That an expression for having a good time and being wild.

S: Ah. Run the roads.

Run the roads

Could be why Colleen was so nervous.

S: Because you knew he had run the road.

And over a period of time there were times that I provided a room for Paul when times were bad. But he said something to me many, many, many years ago when I first came into Phoenix. And the one thing that I’m hearing everyone say about Paul is he never passed judgment on anyone. And he knew, though, that judgment was passed on him because he didn’t meet our society’s criteri8a, so to speak. But it didn’t deter him by any means. This was his life.

S: Well that’s because he was rather proud of that part.

But he said something to me when I was new to the working, and I don’t know, we were talking about judgment or something and he said, “Kay, no matter what, no matter what I have or what I don’t have, Samuel loves me just as much as he loves anyone else.” And I thought that was pretty profound on his part. And that was the way he lived his service here.

S: Life changes. Circumstances change. Who you are now will not necessarily be who you are tomorrow, next year. I would not wish for you the hardship that Paul experienced in life, and there was a lot of hardship in that life. But I will tell you that the hardship had a whole lot to do with the laughter and the love and the ability to keep on going that he lived and which you are remembering. I would not wish you those hardships, so remember not to be focused on hardships in your life. I would wish you that when you are gone, people will remember you with that love, that laughter, those known chuckles and sweet tears. But you have to earn that by living with love every day, by turning off the judgment, by doing the best you can where you are with what you have, by not whining. All right, the form is telling me not to say this. Well, I was going to say by pulling up your big-girl panties.

You’ve said that before.

S: I know that I have but apparently it doesn’t exactly work with Paul, right? He does not have big-girl panties—or maybe he did. You need to live a life worth leaving because you are leaving the memories of you to many others, and they will remember you for the love and the laughter, the grit, the will, the wisdom, if you give it to them. One of the things you do have a affect on is how you will be remembered.

Paul never lost sight of why he was here in that bigger picture. He never forgot that he was here to learn how to live with love. He had many, many reasons in his life to let go of the effort, and it would be dishonest to say that there were not times that he did not let go of that effort. It’s true, but never long. He knew why he was here and he did what he could to leave behind the laughter and the love and the wisdom that his life was about. And your memories keep that going. Thank you for that.

Now, we’re going to have to keep an eye on that energy, because you know that if that energy is lurking about here, as it is, you might just need to just remind him a little, “We love you so much. We’re so glad that you’re here. Go away.” But you know this was always home for him and your friendship and your love was always, and I mean always, a part of this life, and he was forever grateful for it. Paul is so much bigger now.

October, you are now in October. October means that you are but two months to the end of your calendar year. This year has been remarkable in many, many ways, but one of the biggest ways has been in your life. You have, every one of you have, you have this year had the opportunity to see yourself mastering change, I hope. You’ve had the opportunity to see life hit you with the opportunity for a new life. Now, that will show up in a lot of ways and although I am saying that it hits you, I’m not saying that it’s a bad thing, not at all. But I want you to recognize that this year has been filled with opportunities for you to see differently than you used to, to think differently than you used to, to have come into your life things that you have had to chose, prioritize, discern, to choose what you wanted to be about, what you wanted to do about. You have had at least one major look at yourself, and yes, for most of you that’s every day, certainly every week. It has been a year that you have been the microcosm of the world’s macrocosm, that what you have had to look at in your life, the doors that you’ve had to look to see if you wanted to go through or not, the opportunities; take them, miss them, the ways of thinking, ways of doing, attitudes, beliefs. You have seen a version of these in the world as well. Some of you—and I’m not certain that you would see it the way I do—some of you have been experiencing the Darfur experience in your life this year. Some of you have been experiencing the Iraq invasion or maybe the long-term, no-end in-sight war. What has your war been about? What do you use for body armor? Are you winning? You have been learning about discernment. Now what is discernment? It’s more than choice. Say that again.

Its choosing with wisdom.

S: Its choosing with wisdom. Perfect, beautiful answer. With wisdom. And how do you get wisdom?

Living every day, conscious living, knowledge tried.

S: Wisdom is knowledge tried, its everyday living. It is conscious living. Sometimes the consciousness part of it comes up along the back side of you, though, and hits you over the head before you’re quite aware that “This is a good thing I’m learning here.” And if there was a word that I would say that has been your life this year, I would say discernment has been it. The year of figuring out what is right, and not right or wrong, but right in the midst of many rights, or right in the midst of a whole lot of gray. You’ve been smack in the middle of extremes and the law of extremes which makes it appear that there’s this choice or there’s this choice and that’s all it is, so why can’t you just get along with it? And you start putting that monkey on your back and you miss altogether that it’s not about which door you choose, it’s about why you choose it. That’s discernment. It’s not about you all the time, and discernment allows you to know when that’s the case. It’s not about what you are going to get out of it all the time. Discernment helps you see that. Discernment is very much the tightrope walk of life. You keep everything in balance and maybe you won’t fall; key word there . . .


S: Right, absolutely right. Maybe was the key word there. . . . Might not fall, but you know that you’ve got to be careful not to tell the Universe that you ought to avoid falling, because it likes to show you how strong you are. It likes to show you how easy it is, and it does that by bringing you opportunities in your life to figure out that you really aren’t afraid of falling because you’ve done it so much it’s not scary anymore.

Discernment is a statement about not fearing life. You do not have good discernment when you fear life, because you’re spending all of your time trying to control things so that what your fear won’t show up. And remember, the Universe loves you. It’s going to help you see that what you’re afraid of isn’t such a bad “Boogie” at all by making sure that you deal with it—sometimes again and again and again—so that you’ll get it. Isn’t it nice to be loved like that?

The world is also learning discernment, politically; don’t just look at your country for that, spiritually, culturally.

One of the biggest ways to figure out if this is about discernment: You’ve got this situation in front of you: “All right, Samuel said that this is all about discernment, so is this a situation in which I need to practice discernment? Is this something that I’ve got to pay special attention to?” Here is how you know: if you are a part of it, it’s about discernment. It’s about discernment. So if it’s about discernment, I want a few of you to tell me the law to put to that choice. I will start to give you an example and to get out of the way the one that’s going to be the most obvious spiritual answer that you could give so that you could go to the head of the class, all right?

Obviously, ensuring that you live love every step of the way, that you do the most loving thing. One of the greatest rules of right determination—which is discernment, that is large-r Right determination, making the right choices—is to do the loving thing. But here is where I’m going to throw a little water on that. It’s not the loving thing for yourself; it’s the most loving thing for that situation. And very often, unfortunately, that means you’re stepping outside of what you might by rote be doing in order to do what is a part of the greater good. I don’t want you to misunderstand with that. When you’re functioning at your highest and best then it’s not an issue. It’s when you’re in the face of the lions that are hungry and are tempting you to behave in a way that isn’t necessarily the best, that’s when discernment is easily justified as self-judgment, and your tendency therefore is to say, “Oh, well, I shouldn’t be doing that. I should just go with what I really want.” Living love, the easiest thing to say and the hardest thing to live that there is to give you. But that’s the obvious part.

How do you know, how do you discern what is the right thing to do? How do you practice discernment? Gwendolyn. Thank you.

Having listened for a long time, as you know, and slowly this has become what I see as my life. I trust myself. You do know within you, in given situations, what is the best thing. If you have any questions and you’re considering something else, you’ve missed the obvious.

S: And of course, that requires having had a few times of missing the obvious . . .

Oh, yes.

S: . . . and figuring out, “Maybe that little voice inside my head isn’t . . .” Well a whole lot of jokes just went by. I told you, “Not now.” That little voice in your head says, “Try it this way.” That little voice says, “Don’t do this. I’m afraid of it.” This little voice says, “I am confident now because you did it right then.” And you learn to hear that voice and you learn to act on that advice so that the time comes that you can trust yourself.

I ask for it. I say, “Please, I don’t need a two-by-four. Just tell me what I should do here.”

S: And you get it. Aye.

I already knew what a two-by-four was like.

S: Aye. Jeanean, Mary Claire. This side of the room is quiet. Is that a hand up there moving as well?


S: All right, so, Jeanean.

Well, for me, I always know I’m like looking for what’s the best in the biggest picture that will get me . . .

S: Good.

. . . either the people I work with or the situation to the end result or the goal that we have accomplished.

S: Stepping out of the small view, moving up to the greater perspective, excellent.

I think I’ve, sort of what Gwen was saying. I know what it feels like to be in that space versus eagle space or whatever. I know . . .

S: You.

Yes, so I know, even on an energetic level what that feels like. So, when I go to that other place, I know what that feels like too, and I know I’m not there, where I want to be. So I step back and I look at what’s going to really serve the highest purpose.

S: Excellent.

And I do that.

S: It’s not about always doing it right; it’s about doing the right thing. But you do not know what the right thing is until you’ve had a bit of an opportunity to learn otherwise or until you know yourself well enough to know “These are the signals of something I’m successful with. These are the signals of something I’m not successful with.” And some of those signals are, well, sometimes they’re very physical signals. Sometimes they’re mental reactions, emotional reactions. You know you, and if you don’t, introduce yourself.

And I think it’s sometimes noticing the reaction in the other person or the situation. Because sometimes I may know and I want, and I see this every day in my foster families, and I won’t go there but it’s, I know where I want us to go and be but I have to be patient with where the group is at the time or . . .

S: Welcome to my world.

So I can’t put something out that’s not useful now.

S: Aye, or they’ll get scared off and run away, “Oh no, oh no.” Hate that part, don’t you?

Then it would be just about me.

S: Was Mary Claire next?

Real similar to both answers that have been given so far, but with Gwen’s answer, pretty much that, but I would like to elaborate a bit more. There are so many voices that you hear that, and I’ve learned to know myself well enough to know that sometimes I can get a little confused with the voices. So I give myself time to be quiet with it and to really ask for clarity and to really find out the heart of what it is that would be the best and highest thing to do. And when I give myself that time, that introspection, I may get several different, before I sit down I may have several different views of what I could do or paths I could take, and they all look pretty good. But when I sit down and give myself that quiet time, and I’ll usually write in a journal and just talk to myself in the journal, the higher parts of myself that would have more of a vision of clarity, and it never fails to be just what I need. And it’s not always what I want to hear, but it’s always just what I need And I’ve learned to trust that and I act on it, over and over again. I’ve acted on it so much that I really have built trust with that and it serves me very well.

S: Excellent. Mary Claire has made reference to something that’s very, very important for you to be able to figure out more of which voice is talking in your head, more of what does work and what does not work, and that is to journal yourself. You determine that you get up in the morning and you’re going to put down a question, “I’m looking at going back to school. What are the pros and cons? And your brain just pops all kinds of things out, or sometimes it doesn’t pop anything out; you don’t get an answer. You get a reminder from thirty years ago, but you write it down anyway. And you’re going to see what I guarantee will happen: the evolution of your knowing you better and better and better, your ability to have a sense of how you react and how you think. And ultimately, you are giving yourself the opportunity to see when the voices aren’t you. And what I mean by that is, when spirit, the higher You, the greater You, or if you need to put it in more conventional boxes, when angels or God is speaking to you, that still small voice because you recognize it’s not yours because you’ve let yourself learn yours, so simple, so hard.

After Mary Claire was . . .


S: Bobbi, thank you.

And mine is really like what has already been said but it’s . . .

S: There’s a reason though.

It’s being on to myself, and because the things that are difficult for me to discern are the things where I’m attached in some way and I have to get past that attachment first to make a good decision. And one thing that I read in a book once: that any good decision is worth waiting three days to make. And I’ve used that often in my life, and that is to give myself time to let the, the word I want to say is hysteria, you know, the attachment . . .

S: The panic, but the attachment, yes, yes, that’s the word.

Let that dissolve, and then at the end of that there’ll be a decision that will be able to be. I can discern that.

S: That’s excellent. There’s a lot of excellent wisdom that can be shared and yet I promise to you that ultimately it’s going to end up being, “The more I know myself, the more clearly, the more easily, the more quickly I am able to make decisions, to know what works and what does not work, to know if I have balance on this tight rope.” Your knowing you never ends, because change never stops, because adaptation continues, because what you are right now is only a piece of who you are tomorrow. And all of this seems, well, to me, very basic. You know this stuff, but—and I’ll remind you I hope I never tell you something you did not know—but the fact of it is, for any choice in front of you that you hesitate, that you worry about, that holds you back in the slightest, it’s because your discernment is not sharp enough to get through. And you must know you thoroughly. You don’t have to love you, although I would hope that once you introduce yourself the love comes, but you don’t have to worship the feet you stand on, you don’t have to. Just start small. Come to know you, because that leads to trusting you. Trusting you leads to some huge mistakes and some huge gifts, but you learn as you go. It’s the nature of the beast. There does not come a point, even until the very last breath there does not come a point in which there’s not something to learn about you. 

The small picture is the muck you’re standing in at any given moment. The big picture is, you can move over. You need to see that this year. Your world, well, there’s a lot of muck in it, isn’t there, and it can be all you see, all you focus on, what every cell of your being is working toward changing, “There is this muck and there is that muck. You want this muck and not that muck.” Or you can go to a different field. Yes

One of the things I’ve noticed this past year is that overwhelm doesn’t really help with the process of discernment.

S: Amazing isn’t it?

Yeah, it’s amazing how that works. So one of the patterns I’ve been working on is trying to bring more balance into my life, which is a process of slowing down and taking the time to be honest, and through that honesty, really looking at my motives, which looks, shows me my egos; my ego, which shows me my beliefs, which shows me some patterns, which shows me some . . .

S: This is good, she’s showing you a road map.

. . . which shows me some patterns that I’ve just kept on . . .

S: Of fear.

Yeah, of fear, which has been good to get to see but not necessarily the parts that you really want to look at. But then it goes back to, well, you just have to be honest, you know. So for those in the audience, I’m not perfect so, and I’m working on . . .

S: I would disagree, but that’s all right. I know what you’re saying.

But it really is a matter of taking the time to get to know you. And sometimes that can be scary, because there are parts you just don’t want to look at but, you know, I’m finally getting to the point where I realize, “Well, it’s probably a good thing to look at it so I can let it go.”

S: Well said; well done.

You are a miracle. You are what love is about. You have such power, not only power to change your life but power to change the lives of all that are around you, that are a part of the orbit that you move through. You are a gift and you are amazing potential that will not be accessed if you do not learn what you are and can discern that that is different than who you are, until you know you and are not afraid of what is not you. Two months. You can change the world in two days. You can change your world for sure in two months. To be what you are here to be, you need to do whatever it is that is required in order for you to know and trust and love you. Not you as an imperfect but perfectly workable human, but you as a function of Source in this world.

October is the month of costume awareness. There’s a lot of costumes to choose from aren’t there? There’s a lot of masks that you wear. As I’ve said before, it’s not that you’re wearing the mask that matters; it’s only a problem when you forget it’s a mask—you forget it’s a costume—and you center your whole life around something that is indeed illusion.

This is a very important time in your life. Make good use of it. You never do know how long it’s going to be.

Glochanumora dear ones, happy, happy trails.

You too.

S: Indeed.