January 3, 1999

Samuel: Hello, dears.

Hello, Samuel.

S: What are the plans for the rest of your life? Until Absorption. What are your plans for the rest of your life? Have you made any plans for the rest of your life? And what’s your record thus far about being able to fulfill the plans you’ve made so far? How good are you at following through? How good are you at reasonable goals? How good are you at knowing what you want, instead of what, perhaps, someone else has wanted for you, but you just took on because it was a whole lot easier than trying to figure out for your own self what you might want? What’s involved in what you want? Does what you want involve having to realign the universe to include what someone else wants, because what they want determines what you want? And how often does that one happen? I will be happy if I get this—this person, this thing. What are you doing for the rest of your life?

Sounds like I’m asking you out for a very long date, doesn’t it? So what do you say? And you know, in so many ways, that is what your life is.

Talk to me, for a moment, about the dating habits here in America.

I’ve forgotten.

S: Still in the process of learning, some of you. Still trying to forget, some of you.

Well, this one here tells me it involves phone calls and lunch dates and flowers, and that when you make lunch dates, they get broken by the other party, and when you send flowers the other party stops calling.

S: All right. All right. So, there’s a lot to do there with expectations being unmet. Might we say it that way?

You might say it that way.

S: Aye. Sounding more and more like life isn’t it? Aye.

The gentleman asks the lady out.

S: The gentleman asks the lady, traditionally, although that is changing somewhat, isn’t it?


S: Aye.

It might mean taking the initiative, and not playing by the old rules, and being able to do that without being in fear . . .  you know.

S: So now and again, it is a matter of taking initiative and changing the rules a bit, in order to get what you’re wanting, or at least being able to get enough of it to know if it’s what you want.

What’s the purpose of it?

To get to know one another.

S: Why date? To get to know one another. You think so, do you?

To coordinate plans and do something together. To make plans, and to coordinate plans.

S: To learn how to involve somebody else in your life. To determine if it is compatible enough to be worth the effort. To learn if it’s needed, to share with another, and if so, is it enough of a payback to keep trying at it? Dating is a process by which you learn to get out of you in order to get back into you. Do not go there! Aye. Aye?

It’s also a matter of perspective in that people who don’t do it any more, or who are long married, they kind of look back at the good old days when they say, you know, they might think it was fun. And then some people who are in the process of it, don’t think it’s such fun all the time.

S: All right, that leads me to the next section there, which is, What is the difference between the date chase and the capture? Are there behavioral changes that go on? As Colleen said, there’s a point in life in which you look back on the dating days, and very often you look back on them as the good old days. Why is that? What’s the traditionally thought-of behaviors that are somewhat different?

Well, when we were dating, Ken Tuggle made dinner for me, and […].

S: Not getting this so much, are you?

But then now that we’re married, I mean it’s been along time.

S: And has she also taken over impropriety?

Not entirely.

S: All right. All right. All right, so that’s one example. There are little things that you tend to do as a means of fanning your tail and attracting your mate. As a peacock?

Well knowing that it’s truly not the real you.

S: Sometimes.

Or not the other person either.

S: Sometimes the behaviors that are expressed are so seldom used that you could even say that, perhaps, they’re not even you. And what’s a good sign? How do you know when that’s the case?

Well, as time goes on, the real you begins to show up.

S: Why? Why is it that you’re no longer cooking, and maybe no longer cookin’ either.

You start taking the other person for granted, and you no longer put the effort into it.

S: You take them for granted. You’re no longer putting out the effort. Why are you taking them for granted?

You’ve achieved your goal, and then you don’t have to put out any more.

S: You’re going there anyway, aren’t you? You’ve achieved your goal, and so you don’t have to work so hard to have what it is you want, because you’ve got it.

Well, initially, you are trying to anticipate what the other person wants or needs in a partner, especially if you are very interested. And once you feel secure in that relationship, you may stop working at it, toward investing that kind of . . .  trying to figure out what they want.

S: Security relieves you of the responsibility of anticipating and working toward that goal.

And that the stress of giving all the time creates a wrong impression, you know, because the other person can start anticipating that that’s the way they should always be treated.

S: Let us say expecting, rather than anticipating. So, by your behavior of constantly giving and giving, once you become secure, you no longer have to have that behavior, and then the other person, who has learned how to expect that behavior, starts getting rather angry, because neither one of you has given the person you truly are and both of you find that who you’re secure with is not who you were after in the first place.

That’s easy for you to say.

S: You think so?

Security is often the goal. It’s not the stated goal. The stated goal is, I love you, and I’m doing this because I love you, but it’s to feel secure […].

S: Blessed child, very good. And when what you’re after is security, and commitment means security to you, then once you have that security, any of the things that were required to reach that can be dropped by the wayside, because what you were after was security, not a relationship.

Let’s go back a bit to my saying, “What are you doing for the rest of your life?” and asking you, if I did not sound like I was asking you out for a date. And I want you to switch your thinking, just for a bit, to recognize that the date is your life, and that the connection that you have with Source in your life and the behaviors that you use—the mating rituals—are so very much the same.

When you are seeking a relationship  . . . let me change how I’m saying that. If what you were seeking was a relationship, it would be different, but because what you are seeking is security, you have a dance of manipulation that you have learned to focus through to see through, to hear through, to act through. And you judge what you have and whether or not you have the security, meaning whether or not Source has danced your dance, by how well things have gone your way.

In your life—and I’ve said this before, and I will say it over and over and over—in your life there is but one thing that makes you happy. On this whole planet, in anything that you seek to do, the only part that makes you happy at all—and I’m not talking the laughter in the moment, I’m talking the deep, through-your-heart, touching-your-very-soul joy. The only thing that gives you that is giving love, which shows itself up in guardianship energy as service. Giving love as a means of, to the larger planet itself, serving love. Like you serve up Christmas dinner. Serving up love. Serving love.

And when service—giving love—is the only thing that’ll make you happy, truly happy, then the relationship that you choose to have with Source in this world, in your world, is established. The security comes when you give love. The goal is reached when you give love. The commitment is bonded, is sealed, when you give love. Not when your expectations have determined that you know you have a relationship, because Source has danced to your tune in the same way a human boy or girl dances that silly little game of “I will send you flowers, you will stop calling.” Once I have of you what I want, I will let it go and not keep working at it. I have given love once, and so now I know what that joy is, and that means, therefore, that I have this relationship. And, therefore, there’s nothing more to do. And it’s the only thing on this earth that will satisfy you. And you give that relationship the same amount of work that you give your dates when you are twenty-one years old, or ten. It’s a game.

You have these expectations that a relationship with Source means you have what you want, when you want it, as you want it. It is Source at the end of the rainbow.

A relationship of convenience.

S: Aye. So how is it your relationships work, once you have what it is you want? Well, you’ve said you tend to take it for granted. One stops cooking, because all of the good behaviors that were put on in order to make an impression so that your friend would want you, too, are not longer necessary now that you have been assured of that wanting. You’ve made yourself needed, and then, finally, much to your relief, you are able to stop giving and be the real you.

How fortunate it is that all that I have discussed thus far is unnecessary in a relationship with Source, because you see, beloved ones, Source is seeking you. Loves you as you. And whether you want to ‘fess up to it or not, knows you, knows you underneath all of the layers of outer pretense, the lures. Source seeks you.

But then, you see, that brings up a whole other difficulty, doesn’t it? Because also in that interesting what-are-you-doing-for-the-rest-of-your-life dating-mating schedule of the American human, what is very often—so often that it’s not uncommon at all—what is very often the reaction when somebody really wants you?


S: Back off.


S: Scary, aye. You cannot respect somebody who loves you, because you know you, and so you know they’ve got bad taste. To be afraid. The dog caught the car. Now what’s it going to do? And that very often is what happens with Source as well. When you realize that you are loved and needed just as you are, that you are enough, that it does not require a particular income level, a particular education level, it does not require a specific time schedule, home schedule, that it’s just you and All That Is, and that’s all there is, you become afraid that all you are is not enough for All That Is.

And rather than disappoint, you will back off. Better never to know you can fly than to try and fail. Because you do not believe yourself worthy of unconditional love, you choose to back away from a relationship that might teach you what it could be.

And, goodness knows, you’re right to do it, because you know what would happen. You know that just as soon as you open yourself up to the unconditional love that Source has for you, it’s going to lodge itself within your little heart, and you’re going to be able to give it out after that.

Now, what in the world would happen to the structures of this society if there were a group of people running around here that could unconditionally love others. It’s very wise of you to be backing off from that love, isn’t it? Goodness knows that if you’re able to accept unconditional love, which would then teach you how to give unconditional love, it could possibly change the whole understanding of what a relationship can be about, because a relationship based in unconditional love would have all the fun taken out of it, wouldn’t it? That whole dance would be gone. All of those finely structured, surely genetic, rules would be lost. There would not be the tease and the miscommunication. There would not be the struggle to learn how to manipulate another to your sort of thinking so that you can have the security that you’re after. Oh, there’d be such boring things as communion in communication, trust early on, joy regularly, in many, many places, rather than all of your hopes focused on this one that you’ve invested so much in providing everything that you need. Joy abounding. And, goodness knows, you would not want that would you?

What are you doing for the rest of your life? Do you dare risk a relationship with the Source of all? Well, that’s another thing about relationships, you know. You‘ve got to stay at your own level. Don’t be seeking too far above or too far below you. You will not have enough in common. Stay with your own . . . fill in the blank here. Your own peers. Well, that just blows Source right out of the water doesn’t it?

Much too old.

S: Did you hear that? She says, “Much too old.” That’s quick. That’s good. And way too ugly.

A relation ship with Source would mean you had something in common. Precisely. You might have to think something of you that you have spent a very long time covering over. Sort of like a cat in a clay box. I don’t want to see that part of myself ever. I’ll cover it over and leave.

So let’s go there a bit. What would your life be like if you were dating Source? I’m asking.

It would be ever-changing, evolving.

S: Ever-changing. Evolving. Absolutely, absolutely.


S: Delight full, aye.

I think you would be inspired with love.

S: Inspired with love.

I think it would be challenging.


S: Challenging. Challenging.

You could fly to all your dates.

S: You could fly to all of your dates. Challenging.


S: Forgiving.

You would totally accept yourself.

S: You would be able to fully accept yourself, because you would be fully accepted. Yes.

You’d . . . I’d be trying to be my best, instead of trying to look my best.


Thank you.

S: Ah, a lot of good responses there. You would be much more likely to be your best rather than just trying to look it. You would be paying much attention to the inner person and less to the outer constructs.

There’d be a lot less need for anger and resentment.

S: I’ve never found that to be so. Humans tend to get very angry in those relationships. But you‘re right, insofar as projecting out there, you’d think there’d be a lot less anger and resentment. And certainly what there would be would likely only be from one direction.

Instead of feeling that depth of love that you get on occasion, I would feel it all the time. I would feel very worthy, and I don’t think there are words to describe it, but a real depth within myself that gives joy and satisfaction.

S: Aye. Indeed.

[…] you would have all those other things, you would have moments more frequently. The ecstasy of feeling like you’re home.

I would think there would be a sense of detachment. Much of a recognition that this is a game, not reality.

S: That’s this part.

Yes. More of a game, rather than a reality.

S: One would be a bit more detached from the world if one were dating Source.

One might find that one was in the right place at the right time with the awareness of what was needed, and send it.

S: One might find that their synchronicity bonds were a bit more finely tuned, and that their ability to do something with the awarenesses that came from that sort of long-term contact could be helpful in a larger picture.

I think you’d be incredibly angry and frustrated, because your shadows would be exposed.

S: Very true. Very true. Most humans would behave like four-year-olds, because their whole system of living has been turned upside down, because they are able to see in a greater way than ever before what is not absolutely perfect about them here. And the frustration levels rise, because this place becomes, for some, intolerable , because they are impatient to become what they see, instead of what they are. That is absolutely a common reaction, in both the dating processes human-to-human, and if you were dating Source. Very good. Keenly aware. Good.

If you were dating Source, my guess is you would have to be willing to share, because I cannot imagine Source would be monogamous. In the most loving way, but . . .

S: You would learn to share or be jealous. Indeed.

I would think there would be complete and total trust, and I think I would feel a need to be, for my part, totally honest with my . . . without anxiety, knowing that that connection would be there.

S: And so, you have brought up many good things, things about if there was a relationship happening with Source, the sorts of things you’d be running into, and the behaviors that you would exhibit, and how it would change from the more mundane.

So, let me ask you this: Is that so in your life? Are you detached? Are you unconditionally loving? Are you extremely aware of your shadow? Are you constantly changing and evolving? Are you safe and secure? Do you trust? Are you unable to be untruthful? Are you only truthful? Do you have the symptoms of being in love with Source? Does it have an effect on any of your other relationships? Does that little loving trick you learned from Source work with family? What do you do to function in that light, to live in that light, to have that relationship? What do you do to live it here?

The first thing that you do is you start letting go of individual experience, and you begin seeking union. In order to have a relationship outside of you, you’ve got to get outside of you. So many people in this world, including those who are functioning at high frequency, so many people in this world are still stuck on their stuff. And as is the case with any relationship, in this world or off this world, when you’re so busy working out you, there’s no time, there’s no room in your heart, for anyone else. In fact, most of you in your life do not even seek a relationship until you become lonely first. And you’re not lonely if your total focus is on all of the lovely things you’re doing. If your life is only you, you don’t need a relationship.

You must seek outside. Samuel, you have told us repeatedly, there’s nothing outside there. There’s nothing out in the world. And so, just in case you’re going to play that particular tune, I’ll clarify. The next questions and answers: “Samuel, you once said . . .”

Moving out of the place of satisfying ego into a place of seeking union. Not letting go of self, but expanding to the greater self, is the only way you ever have a relationship. And, yes, sometimes that means you are first dissatisfied with how things are, but I’ll tell you this: You will not establish a relationship if you live in that dissatisfaction. So moving outside of yourself to escape yourself won’t do it. Then every relationship that you have will be a means of you finding out what it is that you’re trying so hard to escape, won’t it? And that’s no different with Source, except, fortunately, with Source you get it a lot faster, harder, quicker, and then it’s over with.

You must seek union, not because you need that which you cannot find in your own self, but because you desire a greater experience of love. And in any relationship, that’s what it takes to draw to you great love. Not the satisfaction of that which you are without, but the enrichment of that which you have, which you seek more of.

Another thing that’s required is a change in perspective or a willingness to see another view of a thing. So many individuals get stuck because they are unable to move out of their narrow view. Here is how it’s going to be. Here is what it’s going to look like. I am seeking somebody with this education and this background, this financial stability, this physical ability. This or something better for the highest good, but it had better not be anything but this, or I will not see it.

Just as a quick aside, remember, when you set it up in that fashion it will come, but it takes longer, sometimes more time than you have—here, this time around. Three lifetimes down the road, well, where’ve you been? Whereas if what you are seeking are characteristics of a spiritual, loving being, it’s very easy to get that one together. Brown eyes, particular height: a lot harder. Loving heart, rich spirit: much easier. Of course, you only recognize what you know, which is why you so often miss what you asked for.

A change in perspective away from your specific expectation, because expectations lead to manipulations in order to control the situation, so that you will have what you can handle and keep you safe. Expectations lead to manipulations in order for you to control the situation, so that you can have what you need to keep you safe. One more time, Bonnie?


S: She was writing so intently there.

I was very focused.

S: Seeking unity. Being willing to change perspective. And then finally, by this point, who you are is functioning at a very different level. It would have to be. And, therefore, at this point, only at this point, is it safe—now I’m using that word dramatically, because you are not unsafe seeking a relationship with Source. You’re not unsafe at any time, but only then is it safe to start looking out for you. But here is the difference at this point: At this point, what you’re looking out for is so different than what it was to begin with. You are seeking less a safe situation, and seeking more the thrill of deep and true love. When you have reached the point in your life when all you want is to live love, then it’s safe to seek love for you. For you. To look out for you.

You’re coming into a year in which your relationship with Source is going to be the guiding light in your life. This is going to be a year in which there is so much going on: the clearing away of the old, the clearing out, the clearing up, the beginning anew. The bringing forth establishing the growing up of the new. This is a year in which there is so much potential within mass consciousness that I can promise you, you should get out now while you can, because you will not be comfortable here at all this year if your driving focus is not to live love to the best of your ability, to be willing to change and grow with it, to seek what is best in a larger picture, rather than satisfying the small one. You will not be satisfied here, and you’ll know it by the middle of next month.

Over these next six weeks, probably five, every issue you still own is going to be shown so that you can tell it goodbye or welcome it home. Be aware. Be ready. You’re going to feel an infusion of spiritual power, of psychic power, of human function at its very highest to such a point that you’re going to be extremely motivated to drop what you’re doing and go out and just serve the planet, exactly as it is. Don’t do that, because then, the month after that, you’re going to be treading water in the middle of the ocean, feeling sort of lost. Why did I do that? Cut myself free like that.

You are coming into a year in which following your heart and allowing your heart to function in this world is going to be the only thing that satisfies you at all. And yet, if you do not know your heart, if your love is yet attached—oh, name the one of a trillion things that people base their love on and attach to that is not unconditional, that is not pure. If your heart is functioning under the old constructs, then so will you.

In this time of year, generally speaking, there are two things that happen very regularly. One of them is people make all of these fine resolutions—I am going to stop doing this, I’m going to do that—and as a result exercise equipment and health-club memberships go way up. I’m going to take care of myself, and start exercising. And the second thing that happens is a whole lot of people start visiting their medical practitioners a lot more often—really—because they’ve set forth unreasonable expectations. They did too much, too fast and fizzled too quickly because of it. They overworked unused muscles and would not see it through because it hurt. Remember I said that, because that’s true with love, that’s true with Source, that’s true with establishing the relationship, that’s true with acting as if you were Source. You hop right in, you start exercising that heart muscle, and because it’s been unused for so long—in a greater way—it hurts. And so you back off. And then you start making the rounds of the practitioners, looking for some means out there to make it stop hurting without continuing the exercise. Just give me the bumper-sticker pill. Make it easy.

In this next six weeks, you are going to be seeing you. You are going to be exercising you. You’re going to be learning to move out of you. And you will find that survival is all of the things that you have been working very hard to stop doing . Survival is going to be seeking refuge with others. It’s going to be releasing your own self. It’s going to be losing your individuation. It’s going to be learning new things and behaviors and making yourself unsafe—all of the things that the old self spent so long finally learning how to guard carefully. You learn to be so proud of your independence and individuation to not need others, to live life on your terms. And it’s good you did, because it’s given you the foundation to move into the next step: Having firmly established you, you now have something to give. And it is back with that circle: It is only by giving that you will be satisfied. But it’s a fully different level. It’s not the physical-earth experience in which safety is the key; it’s the spiritual experience in which a whole and living relationship is the answer. And the Source that you are seeking to date for the rest of your life are those sparks of unconditional love found in the souls—well, look around at this room—in everyone you see.

Quick question: Have you ever been in a relationship that was so deep and filled with love, so safe that you did not have to be together every minute? Oh, sure, you miss them, but they could be in the other room and you did not feel bereft. In fact, they might even be away for awhile, and you’re able to manage because that relationship was so purely, clearly there, you were so merged into one another that you were never ever truly without. Have you ever had that? Can you relate to what I’m saying? A spark of it, perhaps. That’s the relationship with Source that you have right now, you know. Ah, your lover’s just sort of momentarily in the other room. You’re recognizing it or reaching the point in your life where you can feel that. That is what will keep you going.

At the recent high ritual—the dead and the alive; they’re trying—there were many who wondered why it is I did not give away the little fun toys. And I know that some said that, Ah, well now, that was because there were not enough of them. It wasn’t the reason. It was because it was not the sort of place where the energy would allow me to put forth this message, because these are for this message.

Our hearts with feet.

S: Can you see it?

A heart in action.

An act of heart.

A person who’s all heart.

S: There you go.

It’s a little creature that’s all heart.

It’s a heart with no head.

S: Those are working. Change your perspective, love, maybe there is a head within the heart.


S: Very good. It’s a heart capable of action. And that’s what establishes a relationship with Source, which is to say, then, that this is not for everybody, because not everybody, even if they are capable of enjoying toning and really getting into high ritual, they can still be doing it for themselves and not understanding the greater. Having a working heart, but not a heart that works. Nay, this is my idea of a charm. You look at it, and it looks fairly innocuous, but it’s potent, because every time you look at it you’re going to remember that this is what you’re here to be. Possibility. Opportunity. All heart. Heart in action.

Martin, Frank and Matthew, would you serve? Aye, he did. You’re getting used to this now. Aye. Help, help, we’re stuck in here. You can only do this one this way. You cannot give them, they must choose to take them. Aye. Hold on. Not yet. Hold, love, not yet. Aye. Now.

Over the next few weeks, as you move to the great solar exchange, you are going to have opportunities to exercise your heart. You are going to have opportunities to grow in a relationship with all there is that is love. To recognize you as a spark of divine light, and recognize the spark of divine light that is you in others. To merge at the highest and truest levels.

More? Did you remember you?

There’s a little name on the back of it. [It] says China.

S: How fitting. A world of coincidences, isn’t it?

Take care of your hearts, my friends; they are what this world needs to be able to work.

Be well. Glochanumora. Happy trails.