A Labor Of Love

September 5, 2004

Samuel:  Hello, dears.

Hello, Samuel

S: And aren’t you perky tonight? All right, how are you?

Perky.

S: Perky. I can tell, yes, perky. That fits for everyone, does it?

Okay, I’m not perky, I’m tired, but I think I know why. I started a new job and I have to get up at six-thirty or five-thirty, and my body hasn’t quite caught up with it yet. And so I’m just hoping that I can handle all the things I want to handle, and it’s not just my body saying I can’t do it. And so a little encouragement there would help me.

S: So you’re actually saying that it’s not only physically tired, but you’re sort of emotionally or mentally tired as well. Yes.

Getting up in front of that classroom and going, “Okay, the word will come to me in a minute. Oh yes, the word is a noun.” You know that’s kind of a little scary there, where the class is supplying the word before I can.

S: So that what’s she saying there is that for all of you who have been having that very trouble for so long now—what is the word I’m trying to say—it has to do with being tired.

I hope so.

S: That’s it, Sallie, you’re just tired. That’s it. Aye, aye. Ah well, you know, any time you’ve got a big change going on, it always requires the whole system to respond, and what you always—well, I’m not going to make you the only person in here, I’m going to make it a much broader statement—what each of you, all of you, have a tendency to do is to listen to the thing that yells the loudest.

Now if that’s the physical you don’t give yourself the opportunity to realize that there’s some mental tiredness happening there, or there is some emotional tiredness happening there, or even spiritual tiredness happening there, because you’re so busy listening to the sleep mechanism that’s not getting enough, or the legs that aren’t working as much as you want to, or the head that’s pounding and aching. When you are able to remember—and, of course, that’s sort of how it started, right?—when you’re able to remember that everything that goes on with you is happening on more than one level and that the more that you can do to recognize the many levels on which you are experiencing any given thing, then the more that that single yelling part of you is going to be able to release that pain, that suffering, that tiredness, that giddiness, that forgetfulness, that . . . because you’re working on more levels.

There is a lot of very good teaching about only putting statements out, and only letting yourself be around people who are speaking positively and such things as that. And they’re very good, and it’s very important for you to remember, whenever you’re making a change, that you want that foundation to be positive, but this is one of those places in your life in which if you’re not going to recognize the difficulty, you’re not going to get around it. If you are not able to say, “I am just exhausted,” then you are going to have parts of you to do everything they can to get your attention so that you will know you are exhausted.

And having said that, I’ll toss out the reminder: it’s all—all—about balance. Everything, everything that has to do with your physical self, anyway, it has to do with balance. And part of balance is the function of—well, let’s see—the function of function. What you’re balancing ultimately is activity and trust. “Wait a minute, Samuel, don’t you mean activity and rest?” No, activity and trust. Everything that you do in this experience shows itself up in one of those ways. There is action for you to take. There is trust for you to express, to make, to experience.

So something you can do in your life when you are remembering that the extremes are hyperactivity or hyper . . . what’s the other end of that would you say for rest?

Passivity?

S: Passivity. No that has too many implications out of . . .

Hypoactivity.

Lethargy.

S: Hypoactivity. Lethargy.

Hyperinactivity.

S: “Hyperinactivity.” You’re just so helpful. Lots and lots of doing, or lots and lots of not. And the issue of trust, and trust is about recognizing it or building it. You’re never without trust. You might simply be trusting that you don’t trust that person or that situation, but trust. And active function is where you’re going to be finding your place of balance. So, hopefully, that will help a bit.

We were at “So, how are you?” And one was “perky,” and one was, “I am so far from perky, I don’t even know how to say that word.”

How many of you have begun to find a bit of a let-up in some of the challenges that these last, well, I would say few weeks, but it has been more like the last few months for many of you. And I’m sure that many of you would even say the last few lives, wouldn’t you? The last few years, perhaps. Only as a little bit of an aside, you will be finding that, certainly through the next week, maybe the next couple of weeks, that you’re going to be seeing a lot more of that leveling off, becoming easier.

And, of course, that has to do with two things. What two things do you think it has to do with? Just testing, yes. It has to do with your becoming what is needed to better use the energy that’s coming your way, because that’s how it works. It’s always, always, always about you. You are the center of your universe, and you should be. It’s always about you, because you are the one who’s making the choices. And that’s where your next step comes, from the one that you’re at, right now, at this moment.

As you are becoming more aware of what triggers you into behaviors you don’t want to be using any more, as you are becoming aware of the flow amongst people that you love, people that you are around, people that you work with, as you are becoming on to you, finally, you are also finding that you are becoming more capable of responding—acting, rather than reacting. Reacting is a signal that you don’t have balance. Reacting is a signal that you have one of those parts of you not properly distributed, not properly recognized, not properly balanced. You are responding rather than reacting when you allow yourself to recognize that you are in charge, and that’s why I say it’s all about you.

And I’m going to let that lead me into where I’m going tonight, what I’m wanting to talk about. And what I’m wanting to talk about is probably not too much of a surprise to many of you, because I’m going to talk about work. And why would that be?

Labor Day.

S: Labor Day. Somebody tell me about Labor Day, and in your telling about it, try to explain to me why you celebrate only one day of your life per year, when in reality you’re doing it every moment of every day, aren’t you? So what’s Labor Day? Labor Day is that time of the year that is dedicated to . . .

Labor. Work.

The labor force.

S: And why would you want to do that? Why would you want to take a day off and eat hotdogs to celebrate labor’s force? Mary Claire.

Well, for me, personally, I don’t eat hot dogs, but I do use it as a day to think about labor in my own life, and think about my own work ethic, because it’s usually a question of balance in my life. My work ethic is rather strong at times, and it’s for me to reflect on that balance in my life, to give thanks for the opportunities to serve and to work, but also to see how I can create in the coming year, how my labors can become a little more balanced so that all parts of me are being fed and nurtured, and that I have more to give.

S: Very good answer. Very good answer, one step ahead though. Anybody know at all the history of this holiday? Ken.

Roughly 1900 or before, there had not been holidays that represented or recognized the input of blue-collar workers, and people began feeling bad about it, particularly the blue-collar workers, and so they created a holiday to honor the people that actually held up the economy.

S: Blue-collar.

Yes. White collar is the other.

Laborers.

As opposed to real jobs.

Basically all the jobs that are sent overseas now.

S: I don’t know, I think that’s probably not quite accurate. I think about the only ones you have left here are the services. No, that’s over, yes? No?

Labor Day is a very good time for you to think about the way you work, how you work, why you work. And I think that the foundation of it, from what Ken has said, and from what I’m probably making up right now in the moment, is about recognizing the gift given to you in order for you to have all of those fun little things in your life, like streets, and cars and houses, and all of those things that make your life what it is. It is an opportunity to take a look at the—and you may not use this word very much—underpinnings. What does that mean to you? It does not mean underwear, does it?

No.

S: The underpinning, the garter belt of your country. Now that’s a real interesting thought, isn’t it? Ah, you just never know. All right, maybe not the garter belt of your country, but the idea is that foundation, that which is holding things up. An opportunity for you to look into your own life as to what is holding you up. And, of course, you know that when I say that, I mean that both ways. What is holding you up as in what is your foundation? What is your life’s work based on, and what’s holding you up from doing what your life’s work should be.

So that’s where I’m going tonight. That’s where I’m going with what may be an unusually short meeting, because if while I’m talking away, I happen to notice that every one of you have already got this, then there’s no need to keep going and I can let you go to your hot dogs. Except you don’t have hot dogs, you have . . .

Tofu Pups.

Not Dogs.

Smart Dogs.

S: All right.

It’s going to be a long night.

S: So the first thing that I want you to think about is, when I ask you “What is your work?” how many different answers come to you? So think about that for a moment. What is your work? How many different answers come to you? Someone? Colleen.

It could be your occupation.

S: It could be your occupation, yes. And your preoccupation very often, absolutely. Heidi.

It’s how I pay my bills is one aspect of it, but also how I fulfill myself is also an aspect of how I pay my bills. But there’s also how I serve at Phoenix.

S: So you’re saying by that, you have the work, which is the means by which you pay your bills; you have the work that is service, for instance, for this world, in different ways.

When you asked the question, I immediately thought about how the different stages of my life have . . . 

S: Nice.

I would have answered it so differently.

S: Very nice.

All the different stages have presented a different way of working.

S: Let’s take that for a moment. Let’s take that and move with it just a bit. She said that, when I asked the question “What is your work?” she thought about, in her life, the different times in her life, the way she would have answered that question. Can you look at it that way, too? And if you can, give me an example. Colleen again.

Raising children as a mother. I mean, that is a work.

S: That is a work, isn’t it? Aye.

Going to school is a work toward getting an occupation.

S: Good, Good. Going to school. When you were in elementary school, did you think “This is work!”? And you’re probably the only one here who can remember that far back, you know. Was it work?

I would say maybe the later aspects of elementary school were. That’s when more of the teachers started assigning homework and things you had to do outside of the classroom. But, you know, before, I remember enjoying the earlier stages of elementary school, enjoying it, because, you know, we were coloring, we were drawing, we were learning through very creative ways of learning. You know, we had coloring maps, and it was a lot more fun in the earlier stages. And then we started getting textbooks, and stuff, and, you know, in fifth and fourth grade, where we had to bring them home and actually do work and math problems out of them. It was a shock to your system. It was very different.

S: Aye, I was just thinking it sounds a whole lot like what your little spirit says before it takes the dive. It says, “Oh look, it’s so much fun! They’ve got so much to do. They play with each other, and . . .” Well, all right. “They are playful and they laugh and they dance and they have fun. They love and they live. It’s great.” And then you find out there’s homework, and I would say that almost every one of you in here don’t like homework, even now. Ah, yes.

So, as a child, even very young, school can seem like work, at least when it stops being fun. But here is something important for you to remember about that, the key is the fun, and I’ll give you a quick for instance. David, darling, what sort of books do you like to read? Work with me here.

Calculus, statistics, [. . . ] processes, general fun math books.

S: And he’s talking about sitting in front of the roaring fire with a good book. Oh, goodie. Now, how many of you in here would think that was cruel and unusual punishment? Thank you, love. And that fits very well with the point that labor is usually defined not by what you enjoy, but by what you don’t enjoy. When you think about your work, you don’t usually—now, I’m not saying that all of you this is true, because it’s not true for all of you—but for several parts of work in your life, you’re not thinking about the part you love, you’re thinking about the part you don’t like. Because, in fact, in this world, no, in this culture, there is a very strong . . .

Work ethic.

S: That’s the one. A very strong work ethic that says such things as your worthiness—meaning your self-worth, and too often your financial worth—your worthiness is all about your work. And your work is “the career.” There are those in this room, in fact, who have made a career out of coloring.

It’s work now.

S: Or maybe it’s the next step from Play-Doh. Play-Doh, right? It’s mushy stuff many children eat, yes? Play-Doh. Colored clay, yes, yes. [About] your work is often said one of the most atrocious, gut-wrenching lies that you get early on in your life in this culture, [which] is “if you were going to enjoy it, they wouldn’t call it work.” “No pain, no gain.” Heidi.

Sadly, my father, who wasn’t a very happy guy with his work, would always say to me, “Heidi, just wait till you get to the real world.” “Well, dad, what’s the real world?” “Working at a job you hate and never making enough money.”

S: But, be aware of this, one day a year there will be somebody’s hot dog in your honor! So even if you have that job you hate, not making enough money, there will be one day dedicated to you somewhere, sometime. Got a hot dog with your name on it.

And that, that, eats your soul and makes you die faster than any invasive disease, that experience in this world that says “I hate what I’m doing, and yet I’m stuck and cannot get out. I hate what I am doing, and who I am is judged by that which I hate.” 

What do you think that does to the family, by the way? What does it do to the child who knows that her father hates what he does?

Stunts their growth.

S: Certainly in Heidi’s case, aye. You want me to start throwing pukkas at him?

That must be right because my father hated his work too.

S: Well, we should look into this. How many of you have parents who hated their work? And how many of you are pretty short? It think this might be something that should be somebody’s next doctoral thesis—the connection between hating your work and mutated genes. Would you be looking into that, all right?

Sure.

S: All right. Thank you. Aye.

Notice he’s tall.

Yes and my father [. . . ]

S: All right, well maybe we should ask it that way too, just in case. How many of you had parents that loved their work? And how many of you are tall? Of course, if you’re standing next to Heidi, then you’re all tall, aren’t you? And what is it that we say about Heidi?

She is standing.

S: I think it’s a marvelous height.

Good things come in small packages.

S: Of course, aye. That’s her Paiune background. Aye. She just called you a Munchkin.

There are three kinds of work that you do in your life. Now, one part of this is for you to keep in mind, no matter what. The three sorts of work you do in your life are all what you do to put yourself into this world.

And very quickly I want you to let your mind go off to just a very small detour. What is it that I say is . . . what do you call that which is you in the world?

Your ego.

S: Your ego. Yes. Your ego is the label that you put on your presentation here in the world. And in a very real sense, your work is very much your ego. And I want you to keep that in mind. I want you to be able to take a look at that and think about that. Your ego is how you put yourself out in the world. Your work is a function of your ego. So, what is it—and make me come back to the three things work is, all right?—so what is it that says about your work if you hate it?

You hate yourself.

S: Good. Say it again.

You hate yourself. You hate how you’ve chosen to express yourself in this world.

S: Good. Good, because I want to be careful with the “you hate yourself” idea, because some of you are perfectly happy in jobs that you perfectly hate. And then we need to talk about definitions, all right? But, ultimately, that’s the key. To be able to be in a job, for instance, a situation, for instance, that you don’t enjoy but you are able to be happy in spite of it—ultimately that is the key. When you are in one of those works that is a reflection of your ego, it is because it’s not that you set yourself with things you hate, because you are in this work that you hate, and it means you hate your life and you hate your world—no. What it is you are not hating—no—what it is you are hating—and again don’t get tied into that word, because if you really hated it . . . well, that’s another story too—what you’re hating are the choices that put you there, and depending upon your strength internally, you believe yourself stuck or not, you believe yourself capable of happiness within it or not. You believe that the choices were made by you, doing the best you could at the time, or out of your control. You believe that there is something you can do to make change or there is not. And every bit of that relates, every bit of that relates, to what you believe about yourself. And I want to be careful with that, because sometimes what you believe about yourself is inaccurate.

“All right, Samuel, I definitely can agree with that, because I know that in my own life I’ve had these attitudes in which I just thought I was the scum of the earth—which is an interesting thought—and that has changed over time, and I’ve come to respect and care for myself.” And you know, darlings, that’s not the sort of thinking that gets you in trouble. The one that gets you in trouble is the one that says, “I’m too good for this, I don’t deserve this, I expect different, better, more.” When you get in trouble, it’s when you start defining the good things that you have in your life with your particular behaviors that get you there. And then you judge yourself as right or wrong based on that. Big mistake. Easy mistake. Because ultimately that’s what you get all through your life, isn’t it? You color this picture and you show it to your teacher or your mother, or you are so proud of it. “Look at this. This was fun to do. I enjoyed it,” and all of a sudden you get a label, “Oh look, you’re such a good artist.” So now, because you have this label that you’ve got to live up to, you’ve got to keep doing the same thing over and over and over in the same way so that you can continue to have that nice label that says “This is artist.”

Now, in your childhood it probably wasn’t artist, it was good girl, bad girl, good boy, bad boy. And you learned to manipulate what you wanted, what you did, according to the label of those people you depended upon. You learned that when your survival requires you to put forth a particular behavior, you had to call that “happy,” “good.”

So there you are, the small child, and somewhere along the line for the first time it happens that something that made you a good boy, girl, to your mother is not necessarily considered a special, wonderful thing to your father, your siblings, your friends. And then you start into the path of doing everything you could—singing, dancing, coloring, playing—everything you knew because you knew that the way you made people happy, the way that you would have peace, and the way that you would receive the security you needed was to find the label that allowed you to make them happy, to find the behaviors, to find the work you had to do to stay safe.

And when you’re three, safe is you’ve got your next meal, maybe, yes? And when you’re thirty and you’re still doing that, well, the fact of it is you’re actually as malnourished and starved as the three-year-old was afraid, he, she, you, would become.

When your work is based upon an idea that it’s going to bring you approval, and that that approval is going to allow you to fit, to be accepted, when your ego is based on your work—and here’s an example of that: There you are, shmoozing, and somebody says, “Oh, hello, it’s so nice to meet you. What do you do?” Well, most of the time you don’t answer “When?” Most of the time you pop out with your job.

What do you do? How do you define you? Are you able to adapt that answer—be careful, because it’s going to come around and bite you—are you able to adapt your answer in many different ways to the group you’re with at that moment because you learned to do that in order to gain the approval of those others? Can you think of an example for that? Bonnie.

I’m not sure this is where you’re going, but when I was a dance teacher and successful, and had . . . you know, that was a real easy thing to say when someone asked what I did. I taught dance. When I was no longer doing that, I found that I would say, “Well, I used to teach dance. I used to be a dance teacher.”

S: Perfect.

And I would refer back to what I did do and was successful at instead of thinking about the moment.

S: Very good. Very good. Perfect. Suzanne.

Very similar to what she was going to say. I also realized that some people who ask me that, they want less or more. And so I’ll go with the easy answer, “I do lots of things.” And then, you know, I’ll just kind of do a little bit of a laundry list: “I teach some English; I teach some writing; I home-school my son Benjamin, and I do a little music,” and will see kind of where they perk up or whether they kind of want to walk away and then that’s over. “Oh, you play. What do you play?” You know, so it goes to the musician. Or, “What do you teach at LCC?” You know, it just depends on where they want to go, what they’re interested in.

S: That’s good. Another.

My mother’s been ill, so I’ve been in hospital with her a lot, and when some of the nurses would ask me, because I would be doing her care, and they would ask me . . . 

S: What right do you have?

More or less.

S: To step on our toes.

You know, I would say that I was an R.N., and they would say, “Oh, well, where do you work?” And because I know how school nurses are looked at in the community of nurses, generally.

S: Which is what?

That they don’t work as hard, they’re not . . . 

S: Got it easy do you?

Yes, supposedly. I have six hundred patients and they have four. But anyway, so, you know, they just look at it as you don’t need as many nursing skills, and that kind of thing. And so I would find myself explaining to them that I used to work in the hospital, you know, so I do know these things, and really this weekend I realized I don’t have to explain myself.

S: Good. Good. And do you think that that would be different if it was not your mother? I only ask because there’s a sort of proprietary “she’s my mother, I do what I want.”

No, I think no matter who was there, if I was sitting with them I would think I could do what I want because I know how to do it.

S: Because you know how. Good for you. Good for you. Aye.

But you’re able to see by these examples that there are times in your life in which you do adjust what you say you do to what you believe will allow your security system to continue smoothly onward when you are speaking to strangers or others in one way or another.

People like to pigeonhole, you know.

S: Oh yes, those labels, you know.

They say what do you do? And I’ll say, “I make it safe enough for people to heal,” and that doesn’t satisfy them at all. And so then I’ll finally get around to saying I’m a psychologist, and they’ll want to know “What’s your theory?” and “How do you practice within psychology?” And they’ll want to know if it’s cognitive or behavioral, and it just doesn’t quite fit that easily. And so I’ll begin descriptively to tell them some things I do, there are people that just aren’t satisfied because it doesn’t fit the box.

S: It does not fit their personal lake of the known, and it’s not necessarily a situation in which you want to take the effort or you want to take the time to learn enough to create a new place in the lake. Aye.

Tell them to set up an appointment with you.

S: Let’s talk about Oma. Cindy, darling, when most people are going down the street and they see you and Oma, do they think “Oh, that lady has such a pretty dog,” or do they see Oma working?

They see the pretty dog, most of them. Although I did have a neighbor lady stop me as I was walking down the street to make sure that I knew that she realized what a beautiful job that dog was doing, and it blew my mind.

S: And that goes to exactly the answer I was going [for]. People see two things, depending upon their orientation. People see you depending upon their orientation. In fact, those who maybe have issues with dogs being put into slavery for human needs and made service dogs—which I think is ridiculous, of course, because dogs are totally dedicated to pleasing their humans, but nonetheless—they are going to see, translate, accept or not, and judge you by their way of thinking. So those who are afraid of large dogs with many teeth—small ones with no teeth are all right. Do you have people who are afraid of your dog?

Oh, I had a young child as I came out of an elevator with her just scream and scream and scream, and I’ve had grown men jump into the street saying, “Please get away.” I’ve had women raise their babies over their heads.” They’re silly.

S: Because the judgement is happening in spite of what she truly is and what she’s doing at the time. Do you think that what she should do—Cindy—should do then for Oma, is to perhaps wear a label that says, “Loving, happy dog currently in bondage to my blindness. Worthy in many ways of your affection and certainly your respect.”

Oma should wear it.

S: Oma should wear it. That’s right. That would be the one saying about Cindy, “She’s really a very good human. She helps many people. She lets me run and play, and takes me to that interesting person whose energy is constantly changing.” That would be Oma.

[. . . ] will guide blind person for food.

S: Yet another. And I’m wanting you to come to the point that says are you saying that it really does not necessarily have anything to do with what I’m doing, and has everything to do with what somebody else thinks I’m doing. If your security is based on what somebody else thinks of you and your work, well, you may as well be a service dog. If your view of yourself, you worthiness, your capability, is based on what somebody else approves of, you are not going to be happy with what you’re doing.

It is when you are able to look at what you’re doing as an extension of yourself that you are happy with—think about what I just said—when I said an extension of yourself that you are happy with, was it “the extension of yourself you are happy with” or “the what you are doing you are happy with”? Say it again, Mona.

I said “both.”

S: You did, and you are right, because that leads you right back to finding balance. The two extremes: trust and action.

There are three kinds of work that you do. There is the work that you do for yourself. There is the work that you do for others. And there is the work that you cannot help but do, no matter what you think of you, what others think of you, what pays you the best, what satisfies you the most or the least. The work that seems to be the truest connection with what makes you happy.

And they do not necessarily all work in the same career. The work that you do because it makes you happy does not exist in your life if you do not know what makes you happy and if you are not centered enough within yourself to be able to resist the tendency to seek approval in others to judge yourself by. As long as your happiness is based on somebody else’s opinion—if I say it nine times, it’ll be a part of your life—you’re going to have a very difficult time being happy about anything, ever. So knowing what makes you happy means not only the stuff, but the self.

So there is the work you do for yourself, there is the work you do for others. Now, the work you do for others shows up in many different ways doesn’t it? That might be bringing food for the reception afterwards. You’re doing it for others. It might be that you are building a house for someone else. It might be that you are . . . and you can just keep going. As long as the work you are doing for others is recognized as work you are doing for yourself, meaning it is paying you in emotional currency, then you are going to be able to direct the work you do for others away from the things that you are doing because it reminds you of how ridiculous you are and you constantly need to be smacked on the head with your inability to do this and that—which really sounds like a very strange thing for somebody to actually want in their life, doesn’t it? And yet the fact of it is, everything that you do, everything, you do because it gives you something. That one principle recognized can turn around your life in ways that you can just barely imagine.

Everything you do, you do because it gives you something, and the key is, is it giving you something that you would like to think you would be proud of wanting, or is it giving you pain and heartache and disagreement and unhappiness. And if it is giving you things that you don’t like to admit to the world that you must be wanting, you have before you a powerful and important opportunity to say, “Why is it I want this? Why is it worth it to me?” And usually the fastest way you can answer that question is to ask, Who is pleased by what I’m doing? Who is benefiting from what I’m doing?

The work you do for others is work you do for yourself, but what you want to be very careful of is that what you are paying yourself is in those things that make you happy, that feel good about you, that challenge you, and open doorways for successes and good things, rather than “It reminds me of how powerless I am,” “It pleases my parents and even at fifty, that’s still important to me.”

Why do you do that which you do for others? It pays the rent. That’s a great answer, because what that says is you have enough focus in your life that you know “I am doing this and here is what it’s paying, and it goes toward this, and it’s not my whole life. It’s not me inside and out. There’s also this me, and this me, and this me. This me pays the rent, and this me colors.”

And then there is the work that you cannot not do. And, of course, it would be very nice to say that that’s the work that has to do with your spiritual experience, but you know everything you do is spiritual. Your spiritual self is not separate from your physical self, and your emotional and mental self, it’s all the spiritual self. Your physical self functioning at its best and highest frequency, your mental and emotional self functioning at its best and highest frequency is your spiritual self. That which you do because you cannot not do it—there must be a better way to say that, help me here.

The work that you do because of who you are.

S: The work that you are compelled. The work you do in your sleep. The work you do when you’re happy. The work you do when you’re sad. The work that you do if you could quit your job tomorrow and do anything you wanted, it would ultimately hold a piece of this work. The work that you do because you cannot not do it is the one that represents you without gift-wrap, and it’s the most dangerous function of work you have.

As a for-instance, Heidi has some children in her practice who are obsessively compulsive. And they must do what . . . tell me something?

Wash their hands.

S: They must wash their hands and wash their hands.

Sometimes it will be a negative thing.

S: Wash the skin off the hands. And you wake up in the morning and you think, “I’ve got to go wash my hands.” And you walk down the hall and you have to wash them again because it was in the air, or something like that, that’s a reflection of you. You’ve got to do that, but it’s not the spiritual good, all of life is happy, it’s “I’m going to wash my hands until my skin comes off.” Do not think that I am saying this is the spiritual answer, and life gets put into a nice little box and it gets wrapped up with a pretty bow put on it, and it will all make sense and work out. It doesn’t happen that way, because your work in this world is based upon the human you and the spirit you are, and until the two of those are working together, you are not going to find work working for you, because it’s all a way to fit in, a way to get by, a way to get through, a way to make peace, a way to feel good about self when you don’t, to feel bad about yourself when you want. It’s only work, no hot dogs, unless what you are is in charge of what you do. And that is the labor of love. That is the one thing that makes you happy, the only thing that makes you happy. That is the most important work this world could make use of, and it is the best and worst paying job you ever have.

You are here to live love, and everything that goes on in your life is a vehicle for that to happen. And when you are able to live love first the resistance levels go down tremendously insofar as the work you do and the work you do for others. Does it mean all of a sudden you get to get out of that job you’ve hated forever? No, but it might mean you stop hating. Does it mean all of sudden you’re going to get along well with your boss? No, but it might mean that those things that drive you crazy and hurt your heart have a changed perspective within yourself, allowing you—as is the case with any lover—to see as interesting quirks, rather than character flaws.

Is it a question, Frank?

I was going to say it seems like what you’re really . . . one thing that could be said for what you’re saying is that you don’t necessarily need to change anything you’re doing other than your attitude and your perspective of it.

S: You think?

As far as the work situation, if I look at . . . if I’m in a job I hate and I’m able to say to myself, but why am I here, how is it feeding me? And I can see, oh, it’s paying my way or it’s giving me security, or because my self-image is low but by being in this position it helps me feel better about myself, then I can ask in what other ways can I build my self-image? What other ways can I be fed if this job isn’t what I want to be doing? It then gives me options, once I see what it is giving me.

S: Good Very good.

The only way your work will ever work for you is when your work is not about you. The only way your work will ever work for you is when what work is to you is not a representation of your future. It’s all right if it represents your past. It’s all right even if it represents your now at this moment, but you’re in trouble when it represents your future.

You are here in this world to be a part in one of the greatest transformations your world has ever known and you’re in the midst of it right now, and the only thing that makes you happy in it are those activities, experiences, events in which you are able to be loving. And when you’re in those situations you judge yourself as worthy, you see through the perspective of a loving heart, you’re not tied into the three-year-old or the thirty-year-old, the failures of the past, the fears of the present. You are fulfilled in a way that nothing can begin to pay for.

When you are living love, it creates a bond of trust and changes your actions, creating the only place of true balance that there is in your life. If it’s not a labor of love, it’s killing you. And you don’t get hot dogs for that.

Enjoy your weekend. Think about why you do the work you do, be it the work of coming here on a first Sunday, the work of that stuff that pays your rent, the work of reading books, walking dogs, selling pretty things—much nicer than doodads. Why do you do what you do? How do you judge you for what you do? If who you are now could give a piece of advice to who you are once going to be, what would you say about work?

I would say I realize what gifts I’m getting from it.

S: Yes. Glochanumora.